Recent posts
#81
Therapy / Re: Meeting with a new therapi...
Last post by Kizzie - November 02, 2025, 06:53:02 PM
Glad to hear this Beet, hope it goes well! #82
Therapy / Re: Meeting with a new therapi...
Last post by NarcKiddo - November 02, 2025, 05:29:52 PMI'm glad it is looking positive. Thanks for letting us know.
#83
Please Introduce Yourself Here / Re: Insights without action
Last post by NarcKiddo - November 02, 2025, 05:25:00 PMHello, and welcome. I'm sorry you've had such awful difficulties to contend with. Well done for working on healing for the benefit of you and your boys.
#84
Please Introduce Yourself Here / Re: New here
Last post by NarcKiddo - November 02, 2025, 05:20:34 PMWelcome. I'm glad you found us.
#85
Please Introduce Yourself Here / Re: Hi, i'm new :)
Last post by NarcKiddo - November 02, 2025, 05:18:49 PMHello, and welcome. I'm in the UK too. I know how tough it can be to get the right professional support over here - although that seems to be the case everywhere. There's not enough training and experience around CPTSD. I hope you find something suitable.
I'm really sorry you're dealing with the end of a relationship that is reopening wounds. I'm glad you found us and hope you will find some help and solace here.
I'm really sorry you're dealing with the end of a relationship that is reopening wounds. I'm glad you found us and hope you will find some help and solace here.
#86
Please Introduce Yourself Here / Hi, i'm new :)
Last post by ZaffaManz - November 02, 2025, 02:28:42 PMHello,
I'm ZaffaManz. I live in the UK. I haven't been officially diagnosed with CPTSD, but I suspect quite strongly that it's a part of my experience. I've done several online tests, and even a test through my therapy that all scored quite high. I am diagnosed with autism, so i'm not sure if it is that, but i do know that there is a lot of overlap. I've even begun to question my autism diagnosis, wondering if, for me, it's just trauma in disguise.
A short background as to why i align with CPTSD: My father was emotionally volatile and inconsistent. He still believed in corporal punishment. The rest of my family, while not as bad, have often left me invalidated about how i feel. My sister was physically abusive and emotionally abusive. I'm unable to trust my perceptions. My brother gaslights me quite frequently, which leaves me doubting myself a lot.
I'm here because I was recently dumped in a way that reopened a lot of wounds, and realised the support I thought i had isn't capable of supporting me. I'm on my own trying to weather the current storm. I also have realise i'm stuck in a cycle that i'm having a hard time escaping.
I am working to get professional support, but it's slow and difficult. So, in the meantime i though I'd search for a community with folk who could maybe sit in the storm with me so i don't have to face it alone. Even if it's virtual. I would prefer physical presence, but i don't have that at the moment. Just me and my cats.
I play video games, warhammer, enjoy doing to the gym, running and generally being physically active. I meditate as well, but a lot is on hold at the moment because of the current storm i'm in.
Thanks for having me
I'm ZaffaManz. I live in the UK. I haven't been officially diagnosed with CPTSD, but I suspect quite strongly that it's a part of my experience. I've done several online tests, and even a test through my therapy that all scored quite high. I am diagnosed with autism, so i'm not sure if it is that, but i do know that there is a lot of overlap. I've even begun to question my autism diagnosis, wondering if, for me, it's just trauma in disguise.
A short background as to why i align with CPTSD: My father was emotionally volatile and inconsistent. He still believed in corporal punishment. The rest of my family, while not as bad, have often left me invalidated about how i feel. My sister was physically abusive and emotionally abusive. I'm unable to trust my perceptions. My brother gaslights me quite frequently, which leaves me doubting myself a lot.
I'm here because I was recently dumped in a way that reopened a lot of wounds, and realised the support I thought i had isn't capable of supporting me. I'm on my own trying to weather the current storm. I also have realise i'm stuck in a cycle that i'm having a hard time escaping.
I am working to get professional support, but it's slow and difficult. So, in the meantime i though I'd search for a community with folk who could maybe sit in the storm with me so i don't have to face it alone. Even if it's virtual. I would prefer physical presence, but i don't have that at the moment. Just me and my cats.
I play video games, warhammer, enjoy doing to the gym, running and generally being physically active. I meditate as well, but a lot is on hold at the moment because of the current storm i'm in.
Thanks for having me
#87
Please Introduce Yourself Here / Re: New here
Last post by dollyvee - November 02, 2025, 01:57:56 PMHi Beth,
Welcome to the forum
I hope you find what you're looking for here.
Sending you support,
dolly
Welcome to the forum
I hope you find what you're looking for here. Sending you support,
dolly
#88
Please Introduce Yourself Here / Re: new here - still in the st...
Last post by dollyvee - November 02, 2025, 01:56:21 PMHey beauty,
Welcome to the forum I hope you find what you need here.
Sending you support,
dolly
Welcome to the forum
I hope you find what you need here. Sending you support,
dolly
#89
Please Introduce Yourself Here / Re: Hi. Here I am. :)
Last post by dollyvee - November 02, 2025, 01:53:05 PMHi Pete,
I'm sorry that your relationship ended that way. I have definitely been in that situation before, and it did bring up a lot of self blame too. It's really, really hard because on the one hand self blame is a coping mechanism that I had to learn as a child, and on the other there are things that I didn't handle "perfectly," and was a messy human. So, for me, it's hard when a therapist says don't blame yourself because I know I brought my own stuff into a relationship. On the other hand, I also took responsibility for that and was intent on working through it, which isn't always the case for the other person. At the end, it does take two to make it work.
Welcome to the forum, I hope you find what you need here.
dolly
I'm sorry that your relationship ended that way. I have definitely been in that situation before, and it did bring up a lot of self blame too. It's really, really hard because on the one hand self blame is a coping mechanism that I had to learn as a child, and on the other there are things that I didn't handle "perfectly," and was a messy human. So, for me, it's hard when a therapist says don't blame yourself because I know I brought my own stuff into a relationship. On the other hand, I also took responsibility for that and was intent on working through it, which isn't always the case for the other person. At the end, it does take two to make it work.
Welcome to the forum, I hope you find what you need here.
dolly
#90
Please Introduce Yourself Here / Re: Insights without action
Last post by dollyvee - November 02, 2025, 01:43:58 PMHi GcM,
I'm sorry to read all that you're going through and finding yourself in that situation with your partner. I hope you can find what you need here. A lot of us have grown up with NPD family members.
One thing that might be helpful if you do find yourself splitting from your partner and the concern that she will use the kids against you, or put them in the middle, is that you have the experience to draw from when it happened to you as a child, and would likely be a strong role model of "what to do" in that situation for your children. Though it may be difficult for you, and bring up all sorts of past trauma, but it is past stuff and you are not that person anymore, even if it feels like it. It sounds like you have great strength and resiliency to come out of everything and be as self aware as you are about what's going on.
Sending you support,
dolly
I'm sorry to read all that you're going through and finding yourself in that situation with your partner. I hope you can find what you need here. A lot of us have grown up with NPD family members.
One thing that might be helpful if you do find yourself splitting from your partner and the concern that she will use the kids against you, or put them in the middle, is that you have the experience to draw from when it happened to you as a child, and would likely be a strong role model of "what to do" in that situation for your children. Though it may be difficult for you, and bring up all sorts of past trauma, but it is past stuff and you are not that person anymore, even if it feels like it. It sounds like you have great strength and resiliency to come out of everything and be as self aware as you are about what's going on.
Sending you support,
dolly