Recent posts

#81

Family / Re: Left out

Last post by Kizzie - December 25, 2025, 04:51:52 PM

I'm with The Big Blue, bravo for waiting and then responding versus reacting! What you wrote captured the essence of what you went through. I hope it is received as such but of course there is no telling how others will react. What matters most (IMO) is that we speak for ourselves and honour how we feel.

Kizzie

#82

Recovery Journals / Re: Marcine’s journaling forwa...

Last post by Chart - December 25, 2025, 04:51:06 PM

Hey Marcine, your story makes me think... mine was reciprocal love... "I'll do x for you but then you'll do y for me..." Every "service" had a price. 57 years later I finally identified much of the same functioning within myself and the relationships I'd established around me... the recognition was hard. This realization of a programing-pattern moved me rapidly to pure nausea. I woke up to a toxic tradition I carried with a scream. And I'm deeply proud to say I stopped doing it in the instant it was identified (or almost).

Marcine, I think we are all incredibly strong-willed. Just give us the freedom to "see" and we engage. Change is good, a darn nice habit to encourage.
 

#83

Other / Re: Our Healing Porch Part 8

Last post by Chart - December 25, 2025, 04:14:02 PM

Hey BB, I'm certain the wood fires we start here never go out. It is indeed a magical place. I'm gonna meditate awhile while my kids play with their new presents. The fire's really nice.

#84

Sexual Abuse / Re: Self-abandonment since CSA

Last post by Chart - December 25, 2025, 04:08:57 PM

This is the breakthrough I made this Christmas. I vowed to myself to keep myself safe. I'm done serving others at the expense of myself. I've done enough. I will participate and learn to handle safe and mutual relationships that honor the boundaries and resources of both.

Absolutely DD, beautifully expressed.
Happy Holidays to yo too.
 

#85

Family / Re: Left out

Last post by TheBigBlue - December 25, 2025, 02:33:14 PM

That reads thoughtful, clear, and grounded. You explained your truth without attacking, and you gave context instead of silence or self-erasure. Waiting so you could respond rather than react really shows the work you've been doing.


It makes a lot of sense that "life is short" would stir grief and clarity at the same time. You handled it with a lot of care for yourself.

#86

Recovery Journals / Re: Marcine’s journaling forwa...

Last post by Marcine - December 25, 2025, 02:23:54 PM

Love and hugs right back to you, friends 

#87

Recovery Journals / Re: the next step

Last post by Desert Flower - December 25, 2025, 02:18:14 PM

Very nice that you were able to take a walk! And I'm so happy you were able to sleep!

 

Happy Holidays to you too 

#88

Recovery Journals / Re: the next step

Last post by sanmagic7 - December 25, 2025, 01:44:01 PM

just got back from a walk - feels good to be able to do that again.  i have to get some in during the next few days, cuz on mon. i'm getting my 2 final vaccines, and i know i'll be laid up for at least a week, if not more.  still, it feels so good to be able to sleep again.  dang, what a difference it makes.

happy holidays.  carry on.

#89

Recovery Journals / Re: The tipping point…

Last post by Desert Flower - December 25, 2025, 01:36:07 PM

I'm so happy for you spending such a nice time with your kids. Enjoy!

 

#90

Recovery Journals / Re: The tipping point…

Last post by sanmagic7 - December 25, 2025, 01:02:33 PM

and i thank you right back, chart.  hope your holidays are peaceful and joyful, and so glad to hear how well you're doing w/ your kids.  wonderful.  love and hugs