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Here is a thread in which you can record 3 good things, large or small that happened in your day.  It focuses us on the fact that even on bad days there are usually some good things that happen. On really good days it reminds us that we are moving out of the dark storm of CPTSD more and perhaps that our EFs are fewer and less intense. And how good is that?!

[Please note that recruitment for this study is closed]

Please note that recruitment for this study is closed

Complex Trauma survivors from Canada or the USA who are age 19+ are needed for a study about trauma inducing and/or trauma reducing experiences when seeking treatment or services for Complex PTSD within healthcare (i.e., medical, mental health, dental).

This research study will be conducted by researchers from the Smart Lab in the Department of Psychology at the University of Victoria. It will involve a short demographic form and an anonymous interview over Zoom of between 45 - 60 minutes.

To register please click on the following link which will take you to an online screening form -  https://www.surveymonkey.ca/r/D8LD3M9. If you are eligible to participate you will be provided with a study code and the research team will contact you to set up an interview date and time.  Please be aware you may be ineligible for the study. This is not a reflection on you personally, rather it is because you don't meet one or more of the study criteria, which are in place to provide a safe environment for an online research study.

If you have questions/comments, please email the research team at smartlab@uvic.ca rather than me. I cannot respond due to the ethical guidelines for the study which require me to keep at arm's length. 

Kizzie

[Program Overview:]

Free online trauma-friendly meditation classes offered by Adam from the CPTSD Foundation. Learn more and register here - https://cptsdfoundation.org/trauma-informed-meditation/. If you have any questions please contact https://cptsdfoundation.org/contact-us/ rather than me - Kizzie

Program Overview:

In addition to helping reduce stress, anxiety and depression, meditation is often used as an intervention to support healing from trauma.

Many types of meditation involve focusing your mind on one thing (your breath, a sound, an object, or your thoughts to name a few.) While this can be helpful, some people find it difficult to focus their mind. This class teaches a type of meditation that doesn't involve focus but instead allows you to let go of your mind while also redirecting it inward. Because the technique doesn't involve mental effort to focus, it can make it easier to do.

While the purpose of the class is to help people affect change in their lives, there are no instructions on how to live your life when you're not meditating or philosophy incorporated into the class. If the technique works for you; trauma you have experienced can loosen its grip. You may also experience other benefits; keep in mind, like all types of meditation, the results are different for different people.

Generally speaking, the effects that letting go of your mind will have on you personally could come within a few days, for others it can longer. Most will know for sure if this practice of meditation is helpful within the first month. We encourage you to try it and see how you feel.

The course is 4 four consecutive days, typically in the evenings beginning at 7pm eastern.

The first class day runs an average of 120 minutes. The remaining days run 90-120 minutes. If, after the four days, you decide to incorporate this technique into your daily life, there are follow up classes at 1 week, 2 weeks and 4 weeks after the course to ensure you continue to practice correctly and effectively.

Throughout the class, it often takes on a feel of becoming a mini-community, which can help you and others feel connected in new and meaningful ways.

This class is open to anyone, regardless of ever having done any meditation in the past. Simply come as you are, with an open mind.

Very Important – When registering for this program, it is necessary to attend the Day 1 class, Live. If you cannot attend on the first day, please schedule for a future class that fits your schedule better.

Live Monthly Classes on Zoom

We will update this page with the upcoming class dates and include a registration form. All registrations are first come first served. Classes can up quickly so be sure to get your registration in when you see a new class listed.

[Note: This post was made by HealN in another thread here in the Intro Section. I copied and pasted it here in its own thread.]

Note: This post was made by HealN in another thread here in the Intro Section. I copied and pasted it here in its own thread.

Hi everyone. I'm in the throws of inner child work and codependency, and breathwork (not in the same) Flooded by memories, past rape and dv abuse. I didn't know what you called people who behaved this way, but he was the most ruthless kind. Covert and vulnerable who was "salt of the earth" and "Oh my God! you're so lucky you have someone who loves you so much" upon observing his pathological insecurity, and control. I couldn't use a public restroom. When I said I had to leave, he'd say ok, act like it was. Guess who was waiting outside ladies room  I got away only to meet another, learn that behavior had a name, NPD

I AM SURROUNDED! It explains so much of my confusion. My deceased son, and 2 daughters, my sadistic brother and the ladies man brother who thought smacking my sister in law (and me growing up) was good way to "keep her line." He hit her twice in presence and could sit there. My niece and nephews were pleading and I got physical with him to protect her. She, who when I lost my home, when my other became deathly ill, not a call, not a text because not a care. This the most painful thing I have ever known and I have absolutely no one. Not one friend left, no family. Just myself and my autistic, nonverbal son. So I went online but the pictures on there, the meat market vibe is not my thing on a good day. Now, intolerable and triggering. Not to mention I discarded and boy oh boy. I cant say. To think that someone who knows well the hurt, anquish, pain fear, self doubt, and soul stealing horror and agony this is. What animal would ever visit this on another human being for what to me amounts to be sport. They dont do this because they're starving or sick or somehow desperate. But because they can. Want to go thru life where everyday is have it your way. How lovely for them all. I should be so lucky, but I kind of have a thing about not abandoning people, nor put them in pain so I don't have to experience mine. They will sleep with ANYTHING. They're try sexual. But it was something. I had NO idea how meeting satan on earth was going to myt whole life on its axel. I miss my daughter. M best friend but the eldest turned her against me, and about 95% of my family. So I'm doing all of this alone. I signed up for NPD recovery and was gone the 3rd day. the woman is NARC. PERIOD. And she's playing around with minds and the live of really hurt and abused people who trust her and it makes me feel pure wrath. I always hated people who pick on weaker things. I part feel like, mind your business. But if I don't say, doesn't that make me complicate? If my speaking could save one person, it worth it.

Because I don't yet know what's permitted on here, so no names. Except if asked, and its private. I feel like I'm losing it. Yet another betray;. But in my place of recovery? Some people don't make it this is so hard and have nothing but contempt for this so called "coach." When I speak to her I say roach. ZERO apologies. The truth is the light. But, the experience makes me afraid of a coach.
I've been up for 2 days, cant sleep in the dark, endless crying, to point of being on the floor, weight pouring. I am dying inside. Coming to terms with my mom did what she did to me. And my own babies. Pain doesn't even begin to cover it. Yet understand the way around is through. It feels like the world got together and said, "lets attack THIS one." Sure feels that way. I'm praying to God for just 1 friend I can chat with sometimes, but doubt I get it. Just a year ago, I had 8 grandchildren, a guy who loved me, 1 great-grand, 2 daughters, 2 sisters, brother, to having ONE person to support in even the smallest way. I'm so lonely, feel so like garbage, while simultaneously shutting off that voice. I just wish it wasn't so darn relentless and convincing and believable!

I block it out, I absorb. Shut off the voice, then it rushes in . And this will go on, back in forth 24/7. Not one voice of encouragement, support,  and nobody to reinforce my weak sense of value. I know I've said a lot. Thank if you read it all. Don't blame you if you didn't. It still had to be said. No more running from feelings. Its EXACTLY how I ended up in this position. Sending all of you hope, joy  faith, love and light. Most of all, I wish for you, the calm that comes with acceptance. I hope I'll be back and what I'm hoping for. If not, the show must go on. I hear it gets greater later.

Thank you for having me. Hugs.

I received the link to this video from a fellow survivor who will having surgery at the end of the month and was looking up anesthetics, surgery, and CPTSD.  While it may be a little unnerving if you do need surgery at some point, it makes the point about how important it is to disclose that you have CPTSD and identify any medication/substances you may be taking.

Sadly, not all anesthesiologists may be savvy about this, so it may be necessary to advocate for yourself. The video gives you enough info hopefully to do that. (You could even show a dismissive anesthesiologist the video if you feel sassy enough  )

Link - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N1wVfkdW4aU

There has been a bit of an uptick in swearing on the forum and if you read our guidelines you'll see we restrict members from swearing either full swear words of pseudo swear words (e.g., using symbols to create a swear word to get by the sensor like f%ck).  We do so because we found over the years that once swearing gets started it tends to catch on and spread. Because so many of us were sworn at by our abusers it can be really triggering so please look out for your fellow survivors and do not include any form of swearing in your posts.

Thanks!

Kizzie

Here's a link to some DV resources at our sister site Out of the FOG - https://www.outofthefog.net/forum/index.php?topic=39359.0 .

[A Word About Eligibility Criteria]

Hi Everyone:

Professor Colette Smart from the University of Victoria, Department of Psychology is conducting a study about the therapeutic value of expressive arts (movement, art & writing) on healing from CPTSD and is looking for participants. I went through a trial session and found it to be pleasant way of connecting with positive emotions, something we don't often do in talk or other kinds of therapy.

A Word About Eligibility Criteria

Given this is a first-time study of a therapeutic approach to CPTSD, Dr. Smart must look out for the safety of participants first and foremost.  Thus, the eligibility criteria may seem somewhat restrictive, but it is to ensure those participating are feeling fairly stable currently and will likely not need any intervention because of the sessions.  In her words:

In our eligibility requirements, we are looking for people who, while suffering with CPTSD, are fairly stable in their current situation. This is because we are prioritizing safety as the number one thing. This is a new intervention, and we are running a pilot study. Also, we are doing it virtually with people who are not physically in the same place or coming to an office to meet with us. If someone was struggling with stability or in crisis, it would be really hard to help them if they were at a physical distance from the research team.

Because of this, we want to test out the intervention first in a group of people who are most stable in their current situation. Then, based on that feedback, we can decide how to broaden to a more inclusive group of CPTSD survivors. This is fairly common and standard when testing out any new kind of intervention. There is no judgment about your current level of stability and we know everyone is doing their best. But the main priority is so that people will be safe the first time we do this study, particularly because this is a virtual study.

Timeline

The flyer for the study is attached. They are looking to recruit fairly quickly as the group will start Tuesday Oct. 15th and run for 6 weeks from 10am-12:30pm PST. The deadline to apply is Wed., Oct 9th.

Applying

Click on this link and it will take you to the study home page where you will find the eligibility quiz at the top of the page - https://linktr.ee/rhythmsofresilience . There are also some videos which give more information and an opportunity to meet Dr. Smart.

Questions

If you have any questions, please contact Dr. Smart or her student Nikoo Amini at smartlab@uvic.ca.

The forum was ungraded to a new platform yesterday so unfortunately you may find some posts have gone missing. I did not know this was happening and didn't put it in maintenance mode. GoDaddy made the move and did not for whatever reason tell OOTF or us. The posts from their IT person warning me it was going to happen at some point went to my Spam and I just found them now. 

I'm going to look into it and see if I can get those posts back.

In the meantime, please keep a copy of your posts until the OOTF IT and I ensure it's all clear to carry on as per usual.

Kizzie

This follows on to Part 1.

Hope added this in a post in another thread so I thought I would add it here also:

The Survivors Trust is an agency dedicated to helping not-for-profit agencies who dela with seual violence. Link -  https://thesurvivorstrust.org/members-operating-nationally/

Hi Folks:

I've noticed a tendency toward hijacking threads lately. This refers to taking the original poster's  (OP) thread over to talk about your own experiences with the topic/issue. IAW our guidelines I must ask that you not do so. The OP has asked a question or shared their feelings/experiences to get some feedback and I would ask that you honour that. It's OK to talk about how you feel or what you've experienced with respect to the topic, but in the context of the OP's concern or question.

Thanks,

Kizzie

 

Here is a thread in which you can record 3 good things, large or small that happened in your day.  It focuses us on the fact that even on bad days there are usually some good things that happen. On really good days it reminds us that we are moving out of the dark storm of CPTSD more and perhaps that our EFs are fewer and less intense. And how good is that?!

Does anyone here understand bots? Every day I have a number of Russian registrations and today it was 6.  I don't let them on because they have such a bad rep and I want to keep the forum safe.

I'm just curious why they would keep on trying when I have never let registration from Russia go through. Why on earth do they keep trying?  Even if it's a bot they must get report saying "Nope this web site will not accept any of our tries to register."  It's a bit of a mystery to me.  The only thing I can think is that they somehow earn money for pinging a site?

 

[Please note you will need to contact the researchers at smartlab@uvic.ca for a code to start the study]

Hi Everyone:

Professor Colette Smart from the University of Victoria, Department of Psychology is conducting a study on trauma and I have agreed to her recruiting participants from OOTS.  As the information suggests below she is looking for Canadians and this is because the resulting report will be forwarded to Canadian institutions. The study is entirely online starting with a screening (3 minutes) which she and her staff will look at.  If you are selected then you will go on to complete questionnaire (30 minutes) and some cognitive tasks (30 minutes). Once you complete the study you will receive a $20 Amazon gift card. There is a flyer attached to this post which has a QR code to scan for more details.

Please note you will need to contact the researchers at smartlab@uvic.ca for a code to start the study or for more information or questions.

A basic outline of the study is as follows: 

Study objective:

This study aims to examine how exposure to different types of traumatic events can impact our thinking and our emotional functioning. Different types of trauma can be single events (e.g., natural disasters, car accident, assault, adverse medical event such as heart attack, stroke, and brain injury) or complex (e.g., experiencing child abuse/neglect or abuse within a relationship).
 
We aim to recruit adults:

• Aged 19-65 in Canada who can communicate fluently in English.
• Who have had 1+ trauma exposure after birth (e.g., car accident, assault, natural disaster, sudden death) AND/OR
• Whose trauma exposure was a major medical event (e.g., stroke, brain injury, heart attack, ICU stay) OR
• Have a complex trauma exposure such as childhood abuse and/or neglect, abuse in a relationship, being part of a religious or political cult, or being a refugee or someone subject to forced migration.

All participants must have access to a personal computer/laptop with a mouse and keyboard.
 
Commitment from participants:

This study is entirely online, and participants can take breaks between sections. The screener takes approximately 3 minutes, followed by 30 minutes of questionnaires, and cognitive tasks should take no more than 30 minutes.

I just saw an article about a famous author here in Canada, Alice Munro, who it seems denied her daughter was sexually abused by her stepfather. This came to light recently when Munro died in May and her biography was published with no mention of the CSA even though the biographer knew about it apparently.  Here's a link to a story about this not uncommon denial on the part of a parent - https://www.cbc.ca/news/entertainment/alice-munro-biographies-1.7268296.

Another Alice who did the same thing was Alice Miller, renowned for her writing about childhood trauma. Her son wrote a book about her abuse and her denial - https://www.amazon.com/True-Drama-Gifted-Child-Phantom/dp/1980668949html

The mind boggles at such deep betrayal of one's own children, especially Alice Miller whose life was dedicated to educating people about childhood trauma.

It speaks to how deeply society's denial of child abuse, sexual or otherwise is and why it is so important for us to drag it out into the light, again and again if we must.   

So I am experiencing some issues with remembering the word I want to use. It's in there somewhere but I can't quite get it out. This has been going on for about 3 months so I went in to see my doc and true to form she did not panic, but asked me about it and then said let's see you back here in 3 months and see how it's going.

She said medications sometimes can cause this and I did start on two new ones so fingers crossed that's it. Also, I haven't noticed any issues with thinking. I am involved in two projects and the writing and organization part is as sharp as it was when I was teaching/researching in the past so I doubt it's dementia or anything but of course having CPTSD I expect the worst. 

We'll see I guess.     

Every once in a while we notice one of our guidelines is not being followed and in this case it is swearing.  As per the Member Guidelines, swearing in any form is not permitted. We do have a censor but there are ways of getting around it (f*%$, SOB). 

The reason for editing out any form of swearing is because once it starts, it takes off and then the board becomes replete with it. It's a good way of expressing anger, etc., but because so many of us were subjected to swearing as part of our abuse, we do our best to keep it out of posts because it is triggering for many and we want to keep OOTS as safe as possible.

Thanks,

Kizzie

Every once in awhile I see something concerning on the forum, behaviour that isn't quite enough to warn a member or ban them, but enough that I feel it's important to point out a potential issue. 

From time to time we get people at OOTS who are here for the wrong reasons. They want attention or to troll members by running them in circles trying to help them. I'm seeing a bit of that going on at the moment so I'd just like to suggest to members that you trust your gut and if you sense that someone is not here for quite the right reasons maybe stand clear for a bit and see if you pick up on anything. I know it can be hard to tell, but part of recovery is sussing out people who are a bit off so we protect and care for ourselves.

Kizzie

We're always interested to hear how you came up with your name for the forum so let us know!