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This time of year can be really difficult for survivors so I wanted to say that you do have a community here at Out of the Storm, peers who do understand and are behind you. You are not alone and I hope if you are struggling you will reach out and let us send some support and care your way.

  

To those of you who have reported questionable posts recently I wanted to let you know I appreciate it as I can't read through every post here at OOTS. IMO it makes us more of a community if we look out for each other and keep this forum safe and respectful so please keep doing so. 

I look at every reported post and take action as necessary. This ranges from no action, to editing the post and informing the poster as to why, to deleting the account of the reported poster. Please note this last  action is reserved for the few who seriously contravene our guidelines (e.g., obvious trolls trying to upset members on the forum).

If you do see a post you find questionable, please hit the report button.  I am the only one who see's the report and I never reveal who makes the report to anyone.

Many thanks,

Kizzie   

[defending]

Some time back Armee shared a link to an article "The Myth of Mutual Domestic Violence" (MDV) that I think belongs here (and in other sub-sections) as it validates for us as survivors that when we fight back we are not initiating DV or are we trying to dominate or control another, we are defending ourselves. This perspective is really helpful if/when your abuser (or their lawyer if you're in court) accuses you of MDV.  If you know how to fight back about fighting back you will be better prepared and not susceptible to this erroneous argument. 

Other links:

- https://www.goodrx.com/well-being/relationships/is-mutual-abuse-real
- https://www.thehotline.org/resources/mutual-abuse-its-not-real/

[defending]

Some time back Armee shared a link to an article "The Myth of Mutual Domestic Violence" (MDV) that I think belongs here (and in other sub-sections) as it validates for us as survivors that when we fight back we are not initiating DV or are we trying to dominate or control another, we are defending ourselves. This perspective is really helpful if/when your abuser (or their lawyer if you're in court) accuses you of MDV.  If you know how to fight back about fighting back you will be better prepared and not susceptible to this erroneous argument. 

Other links:

- https://www.goodrx.com/well-being/relationships/is-mutual-abuse-real
- https://www.thehotline.org/resources/mutual-abuse-its-not-real/
-

Hi Everyone!

Delighted to announce that the healthcare project I initiated is in the dissemination phase. The guide our team developed and information about the project can be found here - https://www.outofthestorm.website/healthcare-project.

Please note there is a text based pdf for download if you wish to print it out and give it to any healthcare providers you are dealing with.

Planting the seeds for better care!

Kizzie

[male]

We are currently recruiting male patient partners (PPs) from Canada or the USA for a project on closing the gap in healthcare for survivors of complex relational trauma with CPTSD. If you're interested, please watch watch the presentation at https://www.canva.com/design/DAGnQGwI7AM/Bfwi-y2dpzAZwbI6WmTt5A/edit. Being a PP involves people with lived experience of complex relational trauma and CPTSD serving as partners in the project. This is different than being a research participant in that partners are much more involved in actual project work.

It is a requirement of the project recruitment that no applicants who participated in the research study, Part 1 of this project about survivors lived experience with healthcare, will be allowed to join this part of the project for ethical reasons. For the same reasons, please do not contact me (Kizzie) about this opportunity. 

If you're eligible and interested then contact Hiro Ito at Island Health hiro.ito@islandhealth.ca. She is doing our recruiting and she is the only person who will know your real identity. I and the project team will only know you by your pseudonym.

When you contact Hiro, please let her know you've seen the presentation and she will send you an eligibility questionnaire to complete and return to her. She will then let everyone know whether or not they have been selected on June 17th or 18th. If you do have any questions about the project please ask her rather than me.

There will be an honorarium at the end of the project ($40/hour for approx 12 hours). 

Thanks for your interest!

Kizzie

[Who can participate?]

Hi everyone! My name is Maya MacGibbon, and I am a doctoral student in clinical psychology at The Wright Institute in Berkeley, CA. I am recruiting individuals with posttraumatic stress disorder (PTSD), complex PTSD (CPTSD), and those without trauma-related difficulties for a study exploring the relationship between attention and posttraumatic stress. Participants may enter a raffle to win one of three $50 Amazon gift cards upon completing the study. Thank you for considering participating and/or sharing!

Link to participate or view more information: https://wrightinstitute.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/SV_0CV3OwFXdGk4tOS

Who can participate?
Adults (18+) who are fluent in English
No history of ADHD, traumatic brain injury, or psychosis
No current stimulant, antipsychotic, cannabis, or benzodiazepine use
No recent suicidal ideation or psychological crisis

What does participation involve?
A 20-25 minute online study
Completing demographic, trauma-related, and emotion questionnaires
Performing brief cognitive tasks assessing attention and working memory
Anonymous participation through Qualtrics and TestMyBrain (both HIPAA-compliant platforms)
Participation is voluntary, and you may withdraw at any time
Confidentiality & Privacy: No personally identifiable information is collected, except an email (if opting into the raffle), which will be stored separately from study data. Data will be stored securely and used for research purposes only.

IRB Approval & Contact Information: This study has been approved by The Wright Institute's Institutional Review Board (IRB), ensuring ethical research standards. If you have questions, please contact:
Maya MacGibbon, M.A. (Principal Investigator) – mmacgibbon@wi.edu
Eric Freitag, Psy.D. (Dissertation Chair) – efreitag@wi.edu
Virginia Morgan (Wright Institute IRB Chair) – vmorgan@wi.edu

To participate or view further details, click here - https://wrightinstitute.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/SV_0CV3OwFXdGk4tOS. We ask that you are in a quiet, distraction-free environment while completing the study. Thanks again for your time and consideration!

Link to study flyer: https://www.canva.com/design/DAGgvQWdl3Q/yX45650B53KyBXVq0jDeug/view?utm_content=DAGgvQWdl3Q&utm_campaign=designshare&utm_medium=link2&utm_source=uniquelinks&utlId=h320bc3a083

Courtois, C., et al. (2024). Professional practice guidelines for adults with complex trauma histories. American Psychiatric Association. https://www.apa.org/practice/guidelines/adults-complex-trauma-histories.pdf

Here is a thread in which you can record 3 good things, large or small that happened in your day.  It focuses us on the fact that even on bad days there are usually some good things that happen. On really good days it reminds us that we are moving out of the dark storm of CPTSD more and perhaps that our EFs are fewer and less intense. And how good is that?!

[Please note that recruitment for this study is closed]

Please note that recruitment for this study is closed

Complex Trauma survivors from Canada or the USA who are age 19+ are needed for a study about trauma inducing and/or trauma reducing experiences when seeking treatment or services for Complex PTSD within healthcare (i.e., medical, mental health, dental).

This research study will be conducted by researchers from the Smart Lab in the Department of Psychology at the University of Victoria. It will involve a short demographic form and an anonymous interview over Zoom of between 45 - 60 minutes.

To register please click on the following link which will take you to an online screening form -  https://www.surveymonkey.ca/r/D8LD3M9. If you are eligible to participate you will be provided with a study code and the research team will contact you to set up an interview date and time.  Please be aware you may be ineligible for the study. This is not a reflection on you personally, rather it is because you don't meet one or more of the study criteria, which are in place to provide a safe environment for an online research study.

If you have questions/comments, please email the research team at smartlab@uvic.ca rather than me. I cannot respond due to the ethical guidelines for the study which require me to keep at arm's length. 

Kizzie

[Program Overview:]

Free online trauma-friendly meditation classes offered by Adam from the CPTSD Foundation. Learn more and register here - https://cptsdfoundation.org/trauma-informed-meditation/. If you have any questions please contact https://cptsdfoundation.org/contact-us/ rather than me - Kizzie

Program Overview:

In addition to helping reduce stress, anxiety and depression, meditation is often used as an intervention to support healing from trauma.

Many types of meditation involve focusing your mind on one thing (your breath, a sound, an object, or your thoughts to name a few.) While this can be helpful, some people find it difficult to focus their mind. This class teaches a type of meditation that doesn't involve focus but instead allows you to let go of your mind while also redirecting it inward. Because the technique doesn't involve mental effort to focus, it can make it easier to do.

While the purpose of the class is to help people affect change in their lives, there are no instructions on how to live your life when you're not meditating or philosophy incorporated into the class. If the technique works for you; trauma you have experienced can loosen its grip. You may also experience other benefits; keep in mind, like all types of meditation, the results are different for different people.

Generally speaking, the effects that letting go of your mind will have on you personally could come within a few days, for others it can longer. Most will know for sure if this practice of meditation is helpful within the first month. We encourage you to try it and see how you feel.

The course is 4 four consecutive days, typically in the evenings beginning at 7pm eastern.

The first class day runs an average of 120 minutes. The remaining days run 90-120 minutes. If, after the four days, you decide to incorporate this technique into your daily life, there are follow up classes at 1 week, 2 weeks and 4 weeks after the course to ensure you continue to practice correctly and effectively.

Throughout the class, it often takes on a feel of becoming a mini-community, which can help you and others feel connected in new and meaningful ways.

This class is open to anyone, regardless of ever having done any meditation in the past. Simply come as you are, with an open mind.

Very Important – When registering for this program, it is necessary to attend the Day 1 class, Live. If you cannot attend on the first day, please schedule for a future class that fits your schedule better.

Live Monthly Classes on Zoom

We will update this page with the upcoming class dates and include a registration form. All registrations are first come first served. Classes can up quickly so be sure to get your registration in when you see a new class listed.

[Note: This post was made by HealN in another thread here in the Intro Section. I copied and pasted it here in its own thread.]

Note: This post was made by HealN in another thread here in the Intro Section. I copied and pasted it here in its own thread.

Hi everyone. I'm in the throws of inner child work and codependency, and breathwork (not in the same) Flooded by memories, past rape and dv abuse. I didn't know what you called people who behaved this way, but he was the most ruthless kind. Covert and vulnerable who was "salt of the earth" and "Oh my God! you're so lucky you have someone who loves you so much" upon observing his pathological insecurity, and control. I couldn't use a public restroom. When I said I had to leave, he'd say ok, act like it was. Guess who was waiting outside ladies room  I got away only to meet another, learn that behavior had a name, NPD

I AM SURROUNDED! It explains so much of my confusion. My deceased son, and 2 daughters, my sadistic brother and the ladies man brother who thought smacking my sister in law (and me growing up) was good way to "keep her line." He hit her twice in presence and could sit there. My niece and nephews were pleading and I got physical with him to protect her. She, who when I lost my home, when my other became deathly ill, not a call, not a text because not a care. This the most painful thing I have ever known and I have absolutely no one. Not one friend left, no family. Just myself and my autistic, nonverbal son. So I went online but the pictures on there, the meat market vibe is not my thing on a good day. Now, intolerable and triggering. Not to mention I discarded and boy oh boy. I cant say. To think that someone who knows well the hurt, anquish, pain fear, self doubt, and soul stealing horror and agony this is. What animal would ever visit this on another human being for what to me amounts to be sport. They dont do this because they're starving or sick or somehow desperate. But because they can. Want to go thru life where everyday is have it your way. How lovely for them all. I should be so lucky, but I kind of have a thing about not abandoning people, nor put them in pain so I don't have to experience mine. They will sleep with ANYTHING. They're try sexual. But it was something. I had NO idea how meeting satan on earth was going to myt whole life on its axel. I miss my daughter. M best friend but the eldest turned her against me, and about 95% of my family. So I'm doing all of this alone. I signed up for NPD recovery and was gone the 3rd day. the woman is NARC. PERIOD. And she's playing around with minds and the live of really hurt and abused people who trust her and it makes me feel pure wrath. I always hated people who pick on weaker things. I part feel like, mind your business. But if I don't say, doesn't that make me complicate? If my speaking could save one person, it worth it.

Because I don't yet know what's permitted on here, so no names. Except if asked, and its private. I feel like I'm losing it. Yet another betray;. But in my place of recovery? Some people don't make it this is so hard and have nothing but contempt for this so called "coach." When I speak to her I say roach. ZERO apologies. The truth is the light. But, the experience makes me afraid of a coach.
I've been up for 2 days, cant sleep in the dark, endless crying, to point of being on the floor, weight pouring. I am dying inside. Coming to terms with my mom did what she did to me. And my own babies. Pain doesn't even begin to cover it. Yet understand the way around is through. It feels like the world got together and said, "lets attack THIS one." Sure feels that way. I'm praying to God for just 1 friend I can chat with sometimes, but doubt I get it. Just a year ago, I had 8 grandchildren, a guy who loved me, 1 great-grand, 2 daughters, 2 sisters, brother, to having ONE person to support in even the smallest way. I'm so lonely, feel so like garbage, while simultaneously shutting off that voice. I just wish it wasn't so darn relentless and convincing and believable!

I block it out, I absorb. Shut off the voice, then it rushes in . And this will go on, back in forth 24/7. Not one voice of encouragement, support,  and nobody to reinforce my weak sense of value. I know I've said a lot. Thank if you read it all. Don't blame you if you didn't. It still had to be said. No more running from feelings. Its EXACTLY how I ended up in this position. Sending all of you hope, joy  faith, love and light. Most of all, I wish for you, the calm that comes with acceptance. I hope I'll be back and what I'm hoping for. If not, the show must go on. I hear it gets greater later.

Thank you for having me. Hugs.

I received the link to this video from a fellow survivor who will having surgery at the end of the month and was looking up anesthetics, surgery, and CPTSD.  While it may be a little unnerving if you do need surgery at some point, it makes the point about how important it is to disclose that you have CPTSD and identify any medication/substances you may be taking.

Sadly, not all anesthesiologists may be savvy about this, so it may be necessary to advocate for yourself. The video gives you enough info hopefully to do that. (You could even show a dismissive anesthesiologist the video if you feel sassy enough  )

Link - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N1wVfkdW4aU

There has been a bit of an uptick in swearing on the forum and if you read our guidelines you'll see we restrict members from swearing either full swear words of pseudo swear words (e.g., using symbols to create a swear word to get by the sensor like f%ck).  We do so because we found over the years that once swearing gets started it tends to catch on and spread. Because so many of us were sworn at by our abusers it can be really triggering so please look out for your fellow survivors and do not include any form of swearing in your posts.

Thanks!

Kizzie

Here's a link to some DV resources at our sister site Out of the FOG - https://www.outofthefog.net/forum/index.php?topic=39359.0 .

[A Word About Eligibility Criteria]

Hi Everyone:

Professor Colette Smart from the University of Victoria, Department of Psychology is conducting a study about the therapeutic value of expressive arts (movement, art & writing) on healing from CPTSD and is looking for participants. I went through a trial session and found it to be pleasant way of connecting with positive emotions, something we don't often do in talk or other kinds of therapy.

A Word About Eligibility Criteria

Given this is a first-time study of a therapeutic approach to CPTSD, Dr. Smart must look out for the safety of participants first and foremost.  Thus, the eligibility criteria may seem somewhat restrictive, but it is to ensure those participating are feeling fairly stable currently and will likely not need any intervention because of the sessions.  In her words:

In our eligibility requirements, we are looking for people who, while suffering with CPTSD, are fairly stable in their current situation. This is because we are prioritizing safety as the number one thing. This is a new intervention, and we are running a pilot study. Also, we are doing it virtually with people who are not physically in the same place or coming to an office to meet with us. If someone was struggling with stability or in crisis, it would be really hard to help them if they were at a physical distance from the research team.

Because of this, we want to test out the intervention first in a group of people who are most stable in their current situation. Then, based on that feedback, we can decide how to broaden to a more inclusive group of CPTSD survivors. This is fairly common and standard when testing out any new kind of intervention. There is no judgment about your current level of stability and we know everyone is doing their best. But the main priority is so that people will be safe the first time we do this study, particularly because this is a virtual study.

Timeline

The flyer for the study is attached. They are looking to recruit fairly quickly as the group will start Tuesday Oct. 15th and run for 6 weeks from 10am-12:30pm PST. The deadline to apply is Wed., Oct 9th.

Applying

Click on this link and it will take you to the study home page where you will find the eligibility quiz at the top of the page - https://linktr.ee/rhythmsofresilience . There are also some videos which give more information and an opportunity to meet Dr. Smart.

Questions

If you have any questions, please contact Dr. Smart or her student Nikoo Amini at smartlab@uvic.ca.

The forum was ungraded to a new platform yesterday so unfortunately you may find some posts have gone missing. I did not know this was happening and didn't put it in maintenance mode. GoDaddy made the move and did not for whatever reason tell OOTF or us. The posts from their IT person warning me it was going to happen at some point went to my Spam and I just found them now. 

I'm going to look into it and see if I can get those posts back.

In the meantime, please keep a copy of your posts until the OOTF IT and I ensure it's all clear to carry on as per usual.

Kizzie

This follows on to Part 1.

Hope added this in a post in another thread so I thought I would add it here also:

The Survivors Trust is an agency dedicated to helping not-for-profit agencies who dela with seual violence. Link -  https://thesurvivorstrust.org/members-operating-nationally/

Hi Folks:

I've noticed a tendency toward hijacking threads lately. This refers to taking the original poster's  (OP) thread over to talk about your own experiences with the topic/issue. IAW our guidelines I must ask that you not do so. The OP has asked a question or shared their feelings/experiences to get some feedback and I would ask that you honour that. It's OK to talk about how you feel or what you've experienced with respect to the topic, but in the context of the OP's concern or question.

Thanks,

Kizzie