Eerie Anne's Journal

[Eireanne]

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[Eireanne]

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[Eireanne]

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[Eireanne]

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[Eireanne]

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[Eireanne]

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[natureluvr]

Just want you to know I've read several posts, and I resonate very much with a lot of what you said.  I resonate with

"no one ever believed in me and made any effort to show me that I was capable of anything."

and

"I wondered what was wrong with me that there wasn't anyone out there that actually cared that I was alone. Everyone is too selfish and wrapped up in their own lives, sharing with everyone how many presents they have to wrap, how many things they have to bake, how busy and hectic everything is, all the family and friends they are sharing their day with."   

and

"Since everyone is so busy, I can spend all this quality time uninterrupted. I can do ANYTHING and EVERYTHING...or nothing! How exciting is that?"

and

 "I grieve the loss of all the friends I thought I had recently". 

 

[Moondance]

Hi Eireanne- exactly what Natureluvr says

Sending caring encouragement that you are enough as you are.  IMO our circumstances can often be a reflection of CPTSD.

Under all this trauma I'm sorting thru I know there is a loving, kind person, free spirited woman.  I'm just not feeling it yet but as I peel the layers perhaps she will feel okay enough to come back out.

I didn't do it, I didn't cause it.  My trauma brain, body just needs to cath up with that thought/belief.

 

[Eireanne]

Thank you to both Natureluvr and Moondance for the validation. I struggle with how hard this is and how it's changed me into someone no one else I meet can even remotely relate to.  I'm so tired of "That sounds terrible" and "I can't even imagine!" - none of us should be made to feel like an outcast because of what we've experienced...things we didn't do or cause. 

[Eireanne]

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[Eireanne]

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[Moondance]

That it is 

[Eireanne]

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