Deep Blue’s searching for balance journal

[Jdog]

Yes, the site has been glitchy.  I am glad to hear you are coping well with things in your life.  I will send you special thoughts as we get closer to the 21st.

[Three Roses]

Cheers for good vibes! 

[Hope67]

So far things have been going really well the last couple weeks. Only 1 nightmare and 1 flashback last week! Yay! That's huge for me.

I'm feeling good and I'm happy about that cuz the end of April is a rough time for me. The 21st is very tough yearly so I'm hoping my good vibes help me roll through it easier this year

Hi Deep Blue,

Glad to hear you're having better experiences this week - and that you're feeling good and happy.  I hope that April will go ok - and that you'll get through 21st -    We're alongside you. 
Hope 

[Deep Blue]

Got sick last night. I have IBS and my dinner did NOT agree with me.

Went to bed with Pepto clutching my tummy. I had to go to bed early.

Unfortunately when my stomach hurts like that it does tend to trigger certain body memories and certain nightmares.  I woke up at least twice with nightmares of PA. 

So today I was on less sleep and then got nailed with a flashback.  It's too early in April! I'm not ready for the anniversary memories and flashbacks to start now 

[Jdog]

I'm so sorry, friend.  I have IBS also and yes, the symptoms do have strong emotional components.  I'm sending you support as you tiredly traverse this landscape.

Tomorrow is my union's one day strike.  It all just makes me sad and mad.

[Blueberry]

I'm sorry Deep Blue! Hoping for pain-free time for you soon!

[Deep Blue]

Not doin so well,
Struggling today.  Flashbacks, body memories, intrusive thoughts... I'm fading fast.

Reached out to my T. Hope she can fit me in in the next couple days

There needs to be a sad emoticon that isn't crying. I don't cry... 😞

[Blueberry]

Yes, I really hope your T can fit you in! Good on you for reaching out.

[Deep Blue]

Thanks blueberry

My T is fitting me in today at 3:30.

Jolted awake soaked in sweat. Nightmare/flashback of PA.... so much PA... i just need to do my best to stay afloat till I see my T.  Hugs please 

[Hope67]

Hi Deep Blue,
Sending you some warm and safe hugs from across the miles - hope you are ok - glad to hear you're seeing your T at 3.30 and hope it goes ok.

Hope 

[Three Roses]

 

[Jdog]

 

[Not Alone]

  Flashbacks and body memories are so awful. Glad you are able to connect with your T today.

[Deep Blue]

I'm thankful for all of you!

I'm thankful my T was able to see me today. I think she got my hat on straight again.  I see her again on Monday. She said she knows this is a hard time for me and that she appreciates that I'm willing to do the work even though it's hard.

[Blueberry]

   Good your T was able to help and that she has time for you on Monday too.