the next step

[TheBigBlue]

Hi San,
I think you're handling this with a lot of clarity and calm. The way you're observing your own reactions, listening to what the lessening of the internal struggle is telling you, and still giving your T room to figure things out - that takes a lot of awareness.

Reading your post reminded me of one of my sessions, my T merely mentioned that there are other therapy modalities (like psychodynamic) in case I ever felt I needed something beyond CBT. My system instantly went into a full preverbal freeze - a 5-year-old hiding under the table feeling abandoned. For almost the entire 1 hr session I couldn't come out of it. She must have said a dozen times "I'm not abandoning you. I'm here. We have twenty sessions scheduled." But my nervous system just couldn't hear it (yet).

So reading how thoughtfully you're navigating this with your T really struck me. It sounds like you're both trying to move carefully and not overwhelm the system - which in itself is a good sign.

I'm glad you're paying attention to what actually helps your system settle. That feels like important information.
💛

[NarcKiddo]