Unemployment, Flashbacks, NPD "Family" Business

Blueberry · June 18, 2026, 08:53:09 PM

Quote from: GettingThere on June 18, 2026, 08:44:36 PMI passed another first round interview yesterday and passed the second round today!! I was immediately put through to the 3rd round for that position as well!! So now I have two 3rd round interviews booked, one for tomorrow and one for Tuesday!!

This is such a huge day for me in my CPTSD recovery. I'm realizing that I'm not that little 17 year old girl in my room anymore dreaming of escaping to a cheap studio apartment, but with only a part time job that didn't pay enough to make rent. I'm finally starting to realize that I'm twice as old as that little girl, and that I've already saved her <3

GettingThere · June 18, 2026, 10:25:54 PM

Thank you for the encouragement Blueberry!!

zen_racer · June 19, 2026, 02:07:57 AM

Quote from: GettingThere on June 18, 2026, 08:44:36 PMThis is such a huge day for me in my CPTSD recovery. I'm realizing that I'm not that little 17 year old girl in my room anymore dreaming of escaping to a cheap studio apartment, but with only a part time job that didn't pay enough to make rent. I'm finally starting to realize that I'm twice as old as that little girl, and that I've already saved her <3

That's a really good update, GettingThere. It's good to have options. The part I quoted is what stood out to me though. That is quite the realization.

GettingThere · June 19, 2026, 03:05:59 AM

Thank you so much Zen Racer <3 Yes, even more than the job, that realization is the main thing I'm celebrating. I'm feeling so so safe in my body (the most safe I've ever felt) because my inner child is starting to trust that I am a safe adult who can take care of her. And that's the biggest achievement of all

Hope67 · June 19, 2026, 09:24:44 AM

Hi GettingThere,
Wow, that is a really big achievement - I am cheering you

and your inner child too

GettingThere · June 19, 2026, 10:31:13 PM

Thank you so much Hope67!! The third round interview for one of the positions went at least okay. I'm not positive that I got it, and I think there's a chance I didn't, just because I lacked some key experience, but I'm still proud that I did the interview. It was a 70 min interview and the most important thing to me is that even though it was very challenging, both interviewers were extremely kind and polite and I wasn't afraid of them, even when I said a few things that weren't perfectly prepared and when it seemed like I didn't have enough experience for the role.

Even when those things happened, I knew with full confidence that neither interviewer was going to yell at or insult me, that my body was going to be absolutely safe the entire time, and that I had another opportunity that might work out even better for me.

I've been doing a lot of inner child work through this last week of interviewing and my inner child is really starting to understand that when I am doing a "grown up" task, that the results can't be her fault because she's just a kid. She understands that she'll be safe and I'll take care of her the entire time, and that grown up tasks are my job, not hers. And even when the interview didn't go absolutely perfectly, myself and my inner child both understood that we don't need to be perfect to be safe. And for me, even more than any interview result or any dollar amount, that is the biggest success of all <3

zen_racer · June 19, 2026, 11:21:02 PM

Quote from: GettingThere on June 19, 2026, 10:31:13 PMThank you so much Hope67!! The third round interview for one of the positions went at least okay. I'm not positive that I got it, and I think there's a chance I didn't, just because I lacked some key experience, but I'm still proud that I did the interview. It was a 70 min interview and the most important thing to me is that even though it was very challenging, both interviewers were extremely kind and polite and I wasn't afraid of them, even when I said a few things that weren't perfectly prepared and when it seemed like I didn't have enough experience for the role.

Even when those things happened, I knew with full confidence that neither interviewer was going to yell at or insult me, that my body was going to be absolutely safe the entire time, and that I had another opportunity that might work out even better for me.

I've been doing a lot of inner child work through this last week of interviewing and my inner child is really starting to understand that when I am doing a "grown up" task, that the results can't be her fault because she's just a kid. She understands that she'll be safe and I'll take care of her the entire time, and that grown up tasks are my job, not hers. And even when the interview didn't go absolutely perfectly, myself and my inner child both understood that we don't need to be perfect to be safe. And for me, even more than any interview result or any dollar amount, that is the biggest success of all <3

This is such a great update here. I still feel like I'm only just beginning journey towards recovery, and I've learned a lot in what you put here. I wish I related to it more. What I can say is that I have the best job I've ever had in my life so far. When I did the interview, they had several questions wanting to verify my skills, knowledge, and experience where I didn't have the experience they were looking for. I was upfront and honest, but would ask follow up questions of my own or talk about experience that related to it.

"No, I don't actually have direct experience with that aspect of the programming software in setting up that communication protocol, but having been an IT Administrator previously I have a lot of experience with networking communication. Is this something that you could provide any training on or allow me time to get up to speed with?"

I am only just beginning to start any inner child work, and so far it's been slow going because when I do it, I seem to provoke a lot of reactions within myself. Despite knowing I'm physically safe, my nervous system or inner child refuses to acknowledge any sense of safety. To me, you're right. That is the biggest success of all. Given how well you've presented things here and the realizations you're having, I'm sure you're doing very well in these interviews.

GettingThere · Last Edit: **Today** at 02:22:47 AM by GettingThere

Thank you so much Zen Racer, that is very good interview advice. I used the strategy of mentioning related or similar experience as much as I could. But I'm happy because even if the first job doesn't work out, I have a back up plan with my second choice of job.

Having the best job you've ever had is definitely something huge to be so proud of! Congrats! I think the career and inner child work areas of my life developed in a reverse order to yours. When I was younger, I had a very stable career for a while (my first career choice that my abusers later sabotaged) and when my career was stable, I had the opportunity and time to do a lot of inner child work. But then my career completely fell apart later on.

It's very hard to do and takes a lot of time but now that you have the career stability that you fought so hard to achieve, it might be easier to help your body ease into a sense of safety that helps your inner child relax.

Best wishes to you on your healing journey and thank you for all your support <3