Therapist problems

[Three Roses]

Feeling awful today. I had a therapy appointment today, had been looking forward to it. Then yesterday, I get a form letter saying how she's moving an hour south, January 6 is her last day up here, they'll find new therapists for those who don't want to drive to see her (!).

I literally became ill after reading that letter. Went and laid down finally and that helped. Got my lavender essential oil and inhaled a few whiffs! That did help soothe me.

Woke up today and called her office and canceled my appointment. I'm not going to go spill my guts to someone who won't be here for the follow up. Lots of nightmares all night and yukky thoughts swimming around in the ol' cranium today.

So, I'm waiting on a call from someone who will help me choose another new therapist. Yippy skippy. My stomach is still messed up and I feel a bit frozen and disconnected. My IC is having a heyday, blaming me, taunting, and telling me I'm over-reacting.

Thanks for listening.

[mourningdove]

Ugh - that's really disappointing. I'd feel the same way (and I'd cancel the appointment, too). I hope you can find a decent therapist, and hope you feel better soon. 

[Eyessoblue]

Really disappointing for you, it's so hard to get the right therapist and feel safe with them, that's really unsettling for you, I would feel exactly the same.

[Dee]

My understanding is that by law a therapist has to give you three recommendations.  I'm sorry for such a bad experience, I can't imagine she didn't know she was moving.  Maybe closure wouldn't be so bad though?

[Three Roses]

Thanks everyone, maybe it's for the best. Maybe it means the universe or whatever has a better one for me. I'm SO glad we hadn't got very far past the get-to-know-you stage.

[radical]

I just had to go back again to re-read your post to make sure I wasn't imagining things.
She sent you a form letter telling you she was leaving?  $£"*&  (expletive of your choice here, TR).
Some people really don't get it and they shouldn't be doing trauma work.
Trust is so hard when you've been through what we've been through.  It's not like they need to be perfect but they do need to get what it is they are dealing with - in their gut level as well as in their head.
I'm sorry you were treated with such insensitivity Three Roses.  That word really doesn't cover it but it will have to do.
Sending hugs and wishes that you have been released to find someone who does understand.  It makes all the difference.

[Three Roses]

  Thanks

[Riverlad]

Hi Three Roses, I'm so sorry you have had to experience this treatment. Sadly it is so common, here in Aus anyway. Most of our training in the mental health industry doesn't even require we have our own therapy, hence many therapists not having dealt with their own issues, and this is usually ongoing, get blown away by the intensity of our stories and complex emotions and coping behaviors. No "quick fix ten session therapy" for us I'm afraid. To cope their empathy is restricted, we get the feeling of not being heard, understood, cared about nor supported. Pretty much a re-run of past life.

If I could make a suggestion when sounding out a new therapist, if you don't get the gut feeling that they understand you as much as the people on this forum, then perhaps be cautious in your decision.

Sorry to be so "heady" though what you have been subjected to is so ignorant, arrogant unprofessional and unnecessary and that makes me angry. Good luck with the search you deserve the best.

[Three Roses]

Thanks, everyone.   Today I've decided to look at this as an opportunity to get a therapist who's a better for for me. I was starting to feel uncomfortable.

[sanmagic7]

you know, 3 roses, after all you went thru when you first got this therapist, then this happens - well, you may be absolutely right about getting an opportunity to find someone who really does fit for you.  i think what she did stinks - she was a coward!  she should have told you during your session so that she could help you process your feelings, not throw you under the bus with a form letter.  really unprofessional and cold.  wow!

i'm glad you're able to have a pos. perspective about this.  i'd say you've made a lot of progress in strength and growth.  i hate the way she handled this for you.  that wasn't right.  my wish is that you now find someone who has some heart!  big hug to you.  and, i'm really glad you're not going to give up on therapy.  we're not all like her.  : )