Hi all,
I came across this forum recently as I feel the need to be around people who are dedicated to healing their cPTSD and not resigned to some belief that they have to live with it forever. I've done a lot of work and have made some great progress over the last 3 years after finding a wonderful therapist. I'm a bit nervous coming out into the open here as I have some social anxiety but I think this will be good for me as I've learnt the only way to overcome fear is to go through it in a safe and supportive environment. It's great to come across a community of people who are courageous enough to face their suffering in a world that too often pretends it doesn't exist.
I grew up in a highly dysfunctional family with a narcissistic mother and alcoholic father who both had depression/anxiety/rage issues - of course this was just the way it was and was considered 'normal'. As well as chronic anxiety and depressive episodes I spent the first 20 years of my adult life with multiple substance addictions which I finally beat 8 years ago and have recently been getting off psychiatric medication which has also been a 20 year stint. I'm at a tiny dose of the last medication now and taking the last bit very slowly, but very nearly there. I've done a lot of therapy and started healing properly about 6 years ago when I discovered Somatic Experiencing and I have recently been working with the Comprehensive Resource Model and Integral Somatic Psychology which have proven to be incredibly effective at facilitating the access to and healing of deep and very old emotional pain.
What I have learnt and focus much of my attention on now is that the feeling of this massive reservoir of unfelt emotion that sits in my body and subconscious mind is the way to liberation from my painful past. The aforementioned coping strategies that I've used along the way are no longer serving me and whilst I still have considerable challenges I am now strong and skilful enough to be able to work through this emotion in a carefully resourced manner with each passing week bringing a deeper sense of calm, more connection to self and appreciation of the beauty and simple things in life. I'm not sure that I will ever get to a point where everything is 'OK', but I believe I will continue to heal and grow in ways that I could not possibly have imagined had I not had my difficult childhood.
Thanks for letting me be part of this community and I hope I can both benefit from and contribute to!
I came across this forum recently as I feel the need to be around people who are dedicated to healing their cPTSD and not resigned to some belief that they have to live with it forever. I've done a lot of work and have made some great progress over the last 3 years after finding a wonderful therapist. I'm a bit nervous coming out into the open here as I have some social anxiety but I think this will be good for me as I've learnt the only way to overcome fear is to go through it in a safe and supportive environment. It's great to come across a community of people who are courageous enough to face their suffering in a world that too often pretends it doesn't exist.
I grew up in a highly dysfunctional family with a narcissistic mother and alcoholic father who both had depression/anxiety/rage issues - of course this was just the way it was and was considered 'normal'. As well as chronic anxiety and depressive episodes I spent the first 20 years of my adult life with multiple substance addictions which I finally beat 8 years ago and have recently been getting off psychiatric medication which has also been a 20 year stint. I'm at a tiny dose of the last medication now and taking the last bit very slowly, but very nearly there. I've done a lot of therapy and started healing properly about 6 years ago when I discovered Somatic Experiencing and I have recently been working with the Comprehensive Resource Model and Integral Somatic Psychology which have proven to be incredibly effective at facilitating the access to and healing of deep and very old emotional pain.
What I have learnt and focus much of my attention on now is that the feeling of this massive reservoir of unfelt emotion that sits in my body and subconscious mind is the way to liberation from my painful past. The aforementioned coping strategies that I've used along the way are no longer serving me and whilst I still have considerable challenges I am now strong and skilful enough to be able to work through this emotion in a carefully resourced manner with each passing week bringing a deeper sense of calm, more connection to self and appreciation of the beauty and simple things in life. I'm not sure that I will ever get to a point where everything is 'OK', but I believe I will continue to heal and grow in ways that I could not possibly have imagined had I not had my difficult childhood.
Thanks for letting me be part of this community and I hope I can both benefit from and contribute to!