Hi all - new here

[hopeful89]

Hi all, thank you for letting me join this forum    I am a 36yo man living in Brisbane, Australia.

I would just like to share some info about my background. Thank you for anyone that reads though this post 

Also my story includes 3 attempts to fatally harm myself, I won't include those to avoid triggering people.

My story is one about emotional neglect and scapegoating.

I had a troubled childhood whereby I inherited negative social traits from my parents, including extreme low self confidence which I inherited from my mother. I had a terrible time with no joy or happiness for the entirety of my childhood and teens. Further my parents were not supportive of me ever, they did not care about my wellbeing. I know now from doing research that I suffered from emotional neglect.

Fast forward to when I was 27, I started to get more confidence by challenging my thought processes on how I compare to others. When I became more confident and assertive, my parents tried to stop that, which made me suspicious of them for the first time ever. Previously I had blamed myself for my shortcomings in life.

I questioned my parents at that time if they had an effect on my childhood being troubled, as they had proven they are against me. They phoned up the ambulance and said I was having a mental attack. I went to the emergency department and was put on a mental ward and told I was delusional, that I had a good childhood. I got a diagnosis of schizophrenia, as I was not able to adequately explain what my parents did to me in my childhood. However I know now that I suffered from emotional neglect as mentioned previously, and indeed a symptom of that is not knowing why you have problems.

That was 10 years ago, then last year a repeat of the same thing happened. Ever since I got out of the ward I have been advocating for myself to prove I have been misdiagnosed. I am close to my goal, as I have been to a private psychiatrist recently and told I have no symptoms of that illness whatsoever.

My parents have harmed me further by lying to my sisters about me throughout my whole life. My sisters dislike me and I have basically never spent time with them. I hope to change that by showing them how my parents lied to have me admitted to a mental ward.

Anyway I hope that's not too long and thanks again for anyone who read my story. I look forward to connect with everyone here particularly in the "Emotional Neglect" subforum 

[Hope67]

Wishing you a warm welcome 

[NarcKiddo]

Welcome.

I am sorry you had to endure all that neglect and then the gaslighting.

[zen_racer]

Welcome Hopeful89.

I'm sorry that your parents have been so hurtful.  I relate a bit to having parents try to sabotage things in my life, and lie about me to other family.  I'm sorry you've had to go through that.