This time I have more idea...

[Blueberry]

Just read https://www.cptsd.org/forum/index.php?topic=12762.0
and this time I do have more idea what's going on. Tho I'm still fairly fuzzy and confused.

It's not the non-integrated haywire Part, since she has a different name and different appearance and behaviour and is at least partially integrated or maybe wholly (yeah, she's nodding, she feels fully integrated). It's a different shut-down Part that's hard to describe because my mind has gone blank again. So maybe I could call this Blank-Brain Part? No, she's one of the Blank-Brain Parts. So, there's more than one, with different roles. So Blank-Brain who has difficulty learning new steps for using a machine or gadget. I suppose in a way, this Part also goes slightly haywire, or this Part's brain does until pretty much shut-down / blank-brain in the context of what I was learning - how to open and shut a shop door with an electronic card and how to use the cash register. This isn't for a job, it's to use a shop I'm now a mbr of. This particular Blank-Brain doesn't react in any way or seem to resonate with descriptor difficulty learning new steps for using a machine or gadget, doesn't mean the descriptor is wrong tho

It's hard for me. I know that what I've learnt has to move from my head into my muscle memory or maybe general body memory, like to touch the doorknob before putting my card up to it, whether entering shop or leaving, and then remembering which way to turn the doorknob. Probably all logical, but my brain goes blank. It IS important. The shop has to be locked properly when I leave. I think after my brain goes blank and I keep trying that I then go into PANIC, tho I also know that I can sometimes talk myself back down out of panic. I don't know if that's a different Part or not. If I can talk myself out of it, then it must be at least partially integrated NTS. (The Panic, not the Blank-Brain).