Miscellaneous ramblings of NarcKiddo

[dollyvee]

Hi NK,

Like PC said, I know snake pits like yours well. I know my own experiences of going through things like that, and while it has given me a wicked sense of humour, I think it's come at the cost of the little girl who was subjected to all that (and survived!). It was awful to deal with all the appearances/facades and fake realities where she had to protect herself instead of being protected as a child should be. I hope, and am glad, that you are able to distance yourself from that stuff.

Sending you support,
dolly

[NarcKiddo]

I feel so ill I don't know where to put myself.

My Hep C drugs arrived and I have been taking them for a week. I have not had any pains in the liver area since starting them, so that is good.

The trouble is that I have managed to get a chest infection. I started feeling lousy a couple of days before the drugs arrived. I thought it was the Hep C starting to mount another attack and smugly thought it didn't know what was about to hit it.

I have no way of knowing (yet) which of my complaints are side effects from the drugs and which are from the chest infection. I mean, obviously the rattly lungs and crazy high fever are the chest infection. The rather grim nausea I had for a few days after starting drugs is probably due to them. My resting heart rate, which should be low 60s, has been mid 90s. The absolute bone-crushing fatigue is probably mostly the chest infection. At least I hope it is because if I have that for 12 weeks I don't know what I'll do. I literally have to sit down at the bottom of the stairs when I come down, to rest before I plod off to do whatever it was. My appetite has vanished. I ate virtually nothing for 3 days. Food tasted weird and my body just said "no". I can at least eat something now, but only about half of what I should be eating.

Covid test was negative.

I did all the usual home care stuff but the fever climbed. It hit 104 at one stage but that was on Sunday and nothing functions properly at the weekend so no point in trying to get medical care. On Monday it dropped to 100 and I hoped it was on the way out but then went back to 102. So I hauled myself to the doctor. It was a difficult appointment because I was really too tired to go, but the doc can hardly listen to my chest over zoom. And if I say more than 3 words I start coughing violently. So I had to type out the history for the doc to reduce what I had to say. Anyway, she gave me antibiotics. Said they should start working after 3 days max. If they don't then I have to have a chest x ray for pneumonia.

On top of all of this, we needed a new boiler/furnace. The old one was working but 15 years old. We wanted a new one at a time that suited us, not when the old one decided to pack up in the middle of winter, as is usually the case. They're doing some good finance deals at the moment. So we had the guy round to quote on Wednesday, expecting a fit date somewhere in June/July.

Well, as luck would have it they had a boiler and an engineer available on Thursday! Yes, please, said we. Mark turned up and I instantly disliked him, But, whatever. I don't have to like my gas engineer. He finished the job much quicker than expected and seemed in a hurry to leave. You guessed it, the boiler stopped working soon after he left. But it was hard to tell because the house was very hot from the installation and it was not until Friday morning when the house was really far too chilly that I checked the boiler and saw a fault code. So Gareth came that day and gave his opinion.But he was from the Home Servicing and Repairs Department and this was (he said) obviously an installation fault. Mark came round on Saturday bellyaching about having to come out for no pay on his Saturday. He insisted Gareth was wrong but he would do what Gareth said. He could not fix the fault and gave his opinion on what it was. But he did not have the equipment on the van and his supervisor was not working that day so could not authorise the work.

The supervisor of Mark rang on Monday and said he would send Tom on Tuesday. Tom came, disagreed with Mark's view of the problem, identified another one and fixed that. A working boiler. 

Boiler shut down again last night. Tom is coming tomorrow...

I mean, we can cope. We have space heaters for selected rooms and an immersion heater. But the main body of the house is hideously chilly as we are having an unusually cold snap for this time of year. And I am ILL!  I do not need all these workmen around the place. I just need a warm house in which to recuperate.

Because we are supposed to be going on a cruise 2 weeks today. And it's not just being fit enough to enjoy it on the day of departure. The amount of work packing to go on a cruise is huge. I could not contemplate doing any of it right now. Hubby would probably pack but I'd have to tell him what and I have no mental capacity at all right now. I could not tell someone how to butter a sandwich with any cogency! I really need this to be rapidly on the way to recovery by the end of the weekend or I fear for the cruise. Which is a very special one on a brand new ship that we have been looking forward to for a couple of years.

Sorry for the endless tale of woe. But if any of you have been wondering where I am - the answer is - in bed feeling sorry for myself.

[Hope67]

Dear NarcKiddo,
I am so sorry to hear that you're not feeling well - and also that you're having those difficulties with the boiler and the workpeople coming round and bothering you like that.  I really hope you are able to get some rest to be able to recuperate well.  Finger's crossed that you'll feel better in time to do the things you need to do for your Cruise preparation.  Sending you a hug 
Hope 

[Kizzie]

On no NK, I am so sorry to hear you have been so unwell!  I can't imagine being ill and having the furnace go and tradespeople traipsing through the house who don't seem to agree on anything.  I know it isn't much but    and I will keep my fingers crossed that you will make your cruise.

[Blueberry]

 

I hear you've been in bed, but please hear me when I say that I doubt that you've been feeling sorry for yourself, unless I learnt a wrong meaning to that. In my mind that's negative, critical of yourself. With all that's going on medically where you 'feel so ill you don't know where to put yourself' not to mention the boiler problems, you have every reason to be lying in bed (!), trying to rest and recuperate and then keep warm as well.

I'm sending compassion        

  no more liver pain

[Armee]

Oh my goodness NK! That sounds like a very very awful illness. I am so relieved to read you've been to the doctor. Please stay on top of it if it doesn't improve. That sounds scary! 

[dollyvee]

Hi NK,

I find people like that very stressful, who try to blag their way through things and people who want to throw me a bunch of bs are triggering I would say. As an adult though, you've done a great job of getting second opinions and being able to deal with the problem when you're feeling down. I don't think you're feeling sorry for yourself. It sounds like a lot going on.

Not a doctor here, but it seems too coincidental that you've now developed a chest infection once the medication has been started. Perhaps the two are related, and apologies if you've already looked into this with your doctor. Probablyy just my own medical issues and oversights by doctors coming into play.

I do hope your cruise goes well though. I'm sure you'll have a great time, and whatever you didn't pack you might be able to buy along the way.

dolly