Can a person with CPTSD to also have periods without hypervigilance?

[Bella]

Hi!
Probably an awkward question, but just thought I'd ask people with personal experience;
Like, I know hypervigilance is a symptom of CPTSD. But do one need to constantly be in a state of hypervigilance to get the diagnosis?
I was in a constant hypervigilant state for over 6 months as I attended therapy with an angry non-emphatetic therapist! But now, a couple of months after ending sessions with her, I find my body much more relaxed. I don't have the sense of all-consuming dread and fright, I don't see scary men and angry faces lurking in the shadows as much, I don't startle at the slightest noice, and I have my appetite back. Is that then proof that I don't have CPTSD? Or is that "normal" to also have periods like this, even if you do have the diagnosis?
Like I've mentioned before on this forum, my therapist got angry with me when I suggested CPTSD as a possible reason for my symptoms.. so I don't have a diagnosis. But I can basically tick every box at the symptom-list.
Off course I don't want the diagnosis, I'm just trying to make sense of it all. And it's frustrating when you don't get any validation from people who are supposed to be experts..

[Bella]

...maybe I should also mention, that I've basically been home without much triggers these last months. I do worry my hypervigilance would skyrocket if I went out in society again.

[Not Alone]

But do one need to constantly be in a state of hypervigilance to get the diagnosis?

I can't answer that question; psychiatry is not my professional field. From a personal standpoint, I'm not always in a state of hypervigilance.

[Kizzie]

I don't trigger as much when I am not out in the world much which makes sense when you think about it.  For me home is a safe place and it sounds like it's the same for you. Feeling safe at home is why many of us tend to isolate ourselves and after what we've been through who wouldn't like feeling safe, not being triggered, hypervigilant, etc?  The flip side is it can be quite lonely.

Also wanted to say that IME not all T's are good unfortunately, and that you don't need an official diagnosis to be here.  If you have the symptoms, you're more than welcome. 

[BeautifulCrazy]

I have a CPTSD diagnosis and my hypervigilance comes and goes. It always has.
When I am experiencing an emotional flashback, I am nearly constantly hypervigilant.
Sometimes a little something can trigger me into a hypervigilant mode and I can shake it off quickly.
If I am tired or run down or stressed out, I find I almost default back to hypervigilance. Which is draining. It can be a yucky cycle.
I notice the more I grow and progress with therapy, and in life in general, the less time I spend in a hypervigilant state. I am triggered less and less often too. When I was first diagnosed I was in a hypervigilant state most of the time. Now I would say I spend 10% or less of my time feeling that way. Despite the progress I have made, as of last month, I still fit the criteria for having CPTSD and still qualify for therapy to treat it. I hope that helps you somehow.

[Rainagain]

My thoughts for what they are worth....

A therapist cant diagnose anything, takes a psychiatrist for that task.

I think hypervigilance ebbs and flows but can still be there when we think it is gone, it may not be obvious and overwhelming but I suspect it's just quietly running on standby.

For me depression occasionally takes over and that masks hypervigilance to some extent, masks everything else too.

[woodsgnome]

I've had an odd relationship with hyper-vigilance.

Isolating like I do, I find even that doesn't always seem safe -- kind of like I'm always on guard for when the other shoe might drop -- even with no one else present. In lieu of fearful people, I find myself falling into little (and big) frets about life not being perfect yet and other jolts from having CPTSD.

A few years ago I noticed a positive side to hyper-vigilance that I found favourable, though. I was an improv actor, performing in mostly one-person non-scripted sketches which required quick wit and rapid response in dialogue with other actors and/or the audience. Being hyper-vigilant anyway actually helped.

Pete Walker also noted in his CPTSD study that 'freeze' types can be fairly mindful (I definitely resonate with his 'freeze' description).

Thinking back even further, it wasn't pretty but living within a heightened pattern of sensitivity/vigilance did, I feel, help me discern a bit better the hypocrisies abundant around me.

I think this can work in other areas of cptsd -- that even the most disappointing traits might at least sometimes have a bright side, even if temporary, to how it can affect one's quality of life.

[Bella]

Notalone, Kizzie: Thank you for your response to my post! It is helpful to hear other peoples experiences...

BeautifulCrazy: Happy to hear you are making progress. Brings hope to hear that. Thanks for sharing!

RainAgain: Yes, incorrect title.. It wasn't a therapist, but a liscensed psychologist, so she was able to give me a diagnosis if she wanted to.. anyway, yes I also find it come and go, but always hides right under the surface. I guess the key is learning to identify triggers..

Woodsgnome: Interessting.. never thought about like that before, that it can have a positive side to it. I find it hard to see it like that in my own experience, as I find it terribly exhausting and crippling. But new perspectives is important, so I'll take it with me. Thank you!

[Kizzie]

 

[Rainagain]

With your dismissive psychologist there could be reasons they didn't want to explore a diagnosis.

Some react badly if people try to suggest they have a condition, they think its impertinent to self diagnose or unhelpful somehow as they dont realise trying to gain answers and understanding is part of recovery.

I have had different diagnoses from different psychiatrists, and during a recent court case the two experts were quite far apart because they had selected different symptoms to give most importance to.

Sometimes I wonder if it's because at different times I have different issues which trouble me the most, but generally I think it's because psychiatry is quite subjective, these people seem more like theatre critics than scientists, they have different opinions about the same events.

[Bella]

Rainagain: Yes! I think you're right. It all depends on the persons opinion. We are all different, read different things out of the same situation. When I was admitted to the psyciatric ward, the most scary part was, that suddenly my own thoughts and opinions weren't valid any longer. I was not fit to make my own desicions. Your days, your life really, is in somebody elses hands. And what can you do, if this person does not understand you... don't even want to understand you? Nothing!!!
It freaks me out, and are defenetly not helping me get on top of my situation, and able to work with myself.
I've found I'm doing much better without treatment at the moment. But I do know I won't be able to participate in society again, without support. I hope I'll find the right person to help me move forward in life...
Anyway, thanks for commenting on my post!