#8 - starting over

[Blueberry]

Hey, good for you for pushing through to get an adequate answer! 

[Tee]

  stay strong you'll be ok 

[buddy9832]

San that's tough I can't even imagine. I feel like that's I'll be me with my parents in a few years.

Hang in there! 

[sanmagic7]

hey, blueberry - i actually took some of my power back and got the numbers of both his brother and sister, so i'll be able to call if i don't hear from him for a day.  as i suspected, he hadn't given my number to his bro.  this way, i don't have to wait.  thank you for your encouragement and hugs.   

hi, tee.  yeah, in the end i'll be ok - it's just getting through it all that's energy-sapping.  thanks for the hugs and support   

hi, buddy.  i couldn't imagine this, either, to tell you the truth.  i hope you don't have to go thru anything like this with your folks, tho.  thanks for the encouragement and hug   

talked to him tonite - his breathing is getting more labored, and he's more fatigued.  still, we were able to have some good memories and laughs while i was reading about us getting together, and that's always good medicine for both of us. 

this really sucks, tho.   

[Tee]

  big hugs staying  positive is hard when things are crumbling. I'll hold your hand and give you hugs of encouragement when ever you need them.

[sanmagic7]

tee, i love it.  i'm hangin' on for dear life.  thank you so!   

he's still alive, i'm still reading to him, but he's getting more fatigued, i'm afraid.  i know now what he'd gone thru for so many years while i was sick or tormented, and there was nothing he could do about it but feel frustrated and impotent.  i know i'm battling for his life as much as he is, and it's exhausting.

i did get phone numbers for his sister and brother, tho, and he was much more enthusiastic about that.  he used the term 'if i croak' a couple times, which sounded unusual.  and, i have a deadline to work toward today and tomorrow, so my energy is pretty much depleted. 

[Tee]

  good luck on the deadlines

[Bach]

Thinking of you and your husband, san 

[sanmagic7]

thanks, tee.  today is the big push - getting ready to go at it!

thank you, bach - it means a lot.  he's hanging in there, but he was pretty tired last nite.  i just don't know.

[Three Roses]

Hugs and prayers, for both of you. 💜

[sanmagic7]

thanks, 3r - we'll take all we can get!

[Tee]

  hope today went well and your H is feeling better.

[sanmagic7]

hey, tee - actually he is!  last nite he seemed pretty good, is going to the doc today, wants to get back to work.  whew!   

thank you, everyone, for your thoughts and prayers - they all really helped.

deadline was met yesterday, big adrenaline crash when i was finally finished, complete w/ tears.  it was an awful lot of pressure.

you know, i was prepared for the worst w/ my hub, but not ready for it, if that makes sense.  it feels good to have that lifted.  he thinks this is the second time he's had it, but wasn't tested the first time.  at any rate, a miracle, in my eyes.  so, breathing a bit easier today, some weight has fallen off so i feel lighter, and hopefully i can start breathing a little easier from now on.

still waiting for the papers for my house - it was supposed to have closed on the 15th - i think that's the only neg. thing i've got on my plate right now.  just want to get those and put them away, and hopefully i'll never have to deal with him again.  he sent me an email telling me the sale was done, and how he had to pay over $1000 for closing costs, like i would feel sorry for him?  i don't know, but i don't care.  just leave me alone!

so, therapy this morning, some chores during the day, but i'm looking forward to maybe being able to heal from all this?  could that be possible? 

[Snowdrop]

It's possible and you will!

Good news about your H.

[Tee]

  yeah about your hubby and your deadlines. You will heal from this too !!
  You are a strong powerful woman who has many friends here cheering her on. I'm glad things are starting to look up for you!