Going to finally get help (also, hi!)

[scoutf1nch]

Hi everyone, I first heard about C-PTSD about 9 months ago and so much finally made sense. I'm 38 years old and was raised in an abusive household and then married and divorced a narcissist. I've been in therapy several times to treat the depression and anxiety that resulted but the abuse has never been addressed. I had always thought that my mother was also a narcissist but my sister thinks that she has borderline. That makes a lot more sense to me.

The trauma that I've experienced still affects me (I now know that I'm experiencing emotional flashbacks) and I'm trying to raise a son in the midst of all of this as well. I just really want for him to not be saddled with my issues. I didn't even realize that I had these issues until fairly recently. Or, to be more accurate, I thought I had handled them already. I'm trying to get in to see a therapist that specializes in trauma to start working through everything that has happened to me.

I'm so glad that this website and forum is here. Thanks for reading. 

[JT0519]

Hello and welcome!
I am new here as well. I just heard about CPTSD recently at my intake session with a therapist. I just want you to know that you're not alone. While I don't know every detail about your situation, reading what you've posted reminded me a lot of myself and my family.
I'm glad you've decided to join here. I hope this helps both of us!
Nice to meet you!

[scoutf1nch]

@JT0519 Thanks so much!

[Deep Blue]

Welcome! I like your name.  I empathize with what you said.  I have a son too, am in my 30s and worry about my son being saddled by my problems.

Through the years I've learned to put on a brave face and keep my trauma hidden.  My husband doesn't know about it and I keep everyone in the dark.

This place is an outlet for me. It's the only time I'm actually honest.  Outside my therapist's office these are the only people that I share my story with.  It's a healing place for me and I hope it is for you as well.