My C-PTSD and Relationships

[consultmoi]

Hi there

I am hoping someone can help me.  I was diagnosed with C-PTSD 3 years ago and for the past year I have been dating a woman who I have fell for, she has 4 children and I try and be the best role model I can

Unfortunately when my C-PTSD symptoms occur, all that results is emotional pain for me and my girlfriend and the children don't know if I'm staying or leaving

I have always ended the relationship due to minor disagreements, the fear and dread I feel when we fall out is overwhelming so I push her away and retreat into isolation blocking her on every piece of social media and deleting her number and she gets so angry at me which only makes me feel worse

The symptoms and behaviours of my C-PTSD is not fair on her or the children but my emotions are dictating my behaviours and I just can't stop

She has ended our relationship on one occasion but the rest of the time it's me and for no real valid reason. I'm just so afraid and scared and I act out in an unhealthy way and I don't know how to stop

Even though we get on and I have a great relationship with the children when I am not acting out, I'm not sure if I should end the relationship for good and seek additional therapy ?  or stick with the relationship and continue to work on myself ?

Any help or advice would be appreciated

Mark 

[ricepen22]

Having had two very unstable parents I would strongly suggest more therapy no matter what.

If it's unsettling for the children its likly for two reasons 1) the situation is to hectic and they want you to go away  2) they care about you  , maybe a mixture of both.

I don't know the whole story but it is something to discuss with a T. As ether desision is potentially harmful, for all parties. Maybe a relationship councillor could help.

Good luck 🍀 anyway.

[consultmoi]

Thank you for the reply Ricepen22

Unfortunately the relationship has ended but I hasn't stopped me from seeking therapy so I am going to take some time out to focus on myself and heal

[Three Roses]

Hello and welcome, consultmoi! I'm glad you're here, and sorry to hear of the pain you're in. I hope you continue on a path of taking care of yourself because you're worth it. 

[ccgirlie#1]

If she is compassionate and willing to support you I think you should explain to her what you are dealing with and ask for her understanding and compassion while you seek more therapy.  I am married and I was just FINALLY diagnosed with C-PTSD and really struggle with my marriage to an amazing , but not perfect, man.  He is supportive and understanding but can only support me to a certain degree as it is my responsibility to get professional help and learn how to begin recovery.  I don't believe you have to be single to work on your C-PTSD and think it could even be better to have an understanding person by your side as you get better.