Have You noticed?

[Badmemories]

 


That I have NOT been writing in this section? I have... been trying to figure out why! I have anxiety about this section, so I keep avoiding it!  Not quit sure why......almost like I think that If I read I will have a EF 
Anyway one more thing to think about!

Keep on Keeping on! 

[schrödinger's cat]

Hm... I sometimes avoid doing things that might actually be a very good idea, because I'm worried: what if they don't work? A part of me would rather live with hope than risk that yet another thing fails me. Also, both my mother and my first boss are workoholics with insanely high standards and control issues (I'm just a lucky person that way), and it's left me constantly worried that I'll make mistakes, or that I'll go about things the wrong way... Thirdly, sometimes CPTSD is like having a raw, open wound - you know, the kind that hurts if someone as much as breathes on it - so I just want to leave it alone, to make sure nothing and no one touches it EVER, not until it's a bit healed. Right now, I'm struggling with all three of those things.

It's probably best not to force it. When I'm writing, it's rarely ever helpful to be TOO decisive, the kind that comes with clenched fists and gritted teeth, the kind where you think: "I MUST succeed, I MUST". Instead, it's best to kind of sidle up to the problem, nudge it a few times, then pretend to walk away, whistle to yourself, and then say very innocently: "No no no, my dearest problem, I'm not tackling you... I'm just tackling this eensy-weensy part of you over there... see how tiny it is?"

And I know that. But doing it is soooo haaaaard. Because THAT is yet another method I'm scared of trying out because, if it doesn't work this time, I'll have lost this hope.

Bleargh. CPTSD isn't fun. 

Hah - I only just noticed: you did the very thing I just described!! You were afraid of writing anything in this section... so you simply started a new thread about being afraid of writing anything in this section! Coming to think of it, that's genius. 

[Badmemories]

I have been trying to read more on this section but I start having stomach aches. My heart starts pounding. Like a panic attack . Bad thing is that it is probably what I need the most?

Keep on keeping on! : hug:

[Butterfly]

All in due time, only when you're ready. First step is to recognize the need.

[Kizzie]

You've dipped your toe in the water BM and that's great - kudos     Be kind to yourself and take whatever time you need to go the rest of the way.   

[Rain]

Sending you a    Badmemories.