Can’t sleep 😭-trigger warning, mention of SA

[Matilda3]

Hey. Sorry you suffered like that, and still do.

I had sleeping problems before. Not now. But in the past. Some ideas, pick or leave whatever suits you/doesn't suit you.

- I left my lights on in all of the house.
- I left soothing music on.
- I used essential oils like neroli or lavender.
- I used herbs: saffron, chamomile, valerian, oil of oregano. None of these long-term. All may trigger the drug experience, take care.
- I had a friend who slept in my house a few times when it was real bad. Or where I could sleep in their house. 
- I too used a stuffed animal. I had a big one that felt protective, however weird this may seem.
- I used a benzo, but this backfired, because after quitting I had way worse anxiety.
- Adjusting my diet helped. Avoiding allergic food and processed food and caffeine and all. Anti-histamine diets help some. I think allergic responses trigger cortisol and adrenaline release and thus bring fight-flight responses.
- Put heavy blankets on me. Kids I work with use weighted blankets. This obviously can be triggering too, so experiences vary wildly. From relaxing to frightening.
- There was a medicine they recommended here which I think was Trazodone. I never tried it.
- I had soothing rituals. For me they were faith-based, but this can be other things too. Like I'd always read a certain protective text or listen to the same soothing song.
- I would speak to someone who had a calming influence just before bedtime. Could be a hotline too.
- I changed the room I slept in. I've slept downstairs on the couch for a while. Because for mysterious reasons my mind didn't find that place triggering.
- Call me a fool, but all my doors in the house need to be open (inside doors obviously). Maybe this feels like I can see and flee better.
- I would massage my face or body gently. In a very kind way. As a loving mother would craddle a child.

Sorry...haven't got much else. Wish I had.

[Saluki]

Hey Laurrr,
I struggle with insomnia too and have done all my life. I'm so sorry to hear about the abuse you suffered. That's not fair.

I'm always looking for helpful suggestions too.

Someone suggested listening to audiobooks at bed time. So long as I'm careful to choose something that's not triggering, they have been very helpful so far. I've had a lot of sleepless nights regardless, however, when audiobooks help, I can manage to sleep a few hours and actually get back to sleep if I wake. Choosing stories that are very exciting and suspenseful aren't a good idea, as I found myself staying awake to find out what happened!

Someone else recommended Mirtazipine, which helped me immensely when I was younger. Last time I tried it it helped immensely with calming my mind, with sleep too. The downside was that it caused my digestive system to become very bloated and uncomfortable. Basically, it flared up my IBS really badly. I was so disappointed when the side effects didn't even out after persisting for a few months. I had to stop taking it and I'm currently prescribed an antihistamine combined with melatonin. Without the side effects, Mirtazipine would have been a game changer.

Other sleep aid stuff I do:

I have an essential oil burner with a tea light. The light helps because it's dark enough to sleep but not dark enough to feel scared of what might be in the dark. I use lavender oil and frankincense oil or occasionally damask rose oil. Rose oil is very comforting to me.

I sleep with a hot water bottle for comfort too. Even in the summer. I have no idea why this helps, but without it I can't sleep.

I have to sleep downstairs because I have chronic pain that makes stairs difficult, but the other reason is because it's easier to flee if I don't have to jump out of an upstairs window if my psychopath ex finds me.

I used to read a bedtime prayer out loud (to do with my culture of origin) but I've forgotten to do that for a while. It really, really helped in the past but obviously faith based stuff doesn't help everyone.

I hope you are able to find something that works for you

[Saluki]

Oh,I forgot to mention just sleeping when you get the chance whenever you feel you need to.

Obviously that's not possible if you have children or work commitments, but I was suggested this by a therapist once. She said that she had a client who worked freelance so was able to work very flexible hours and letting go of the traditional "you have to sleep at certain times and wake at certain times" thing was the only way her client could get good enough, long enough, consistent sleep.

A lot of CPTSD sufferers find it easier to sleep during daylight and have a very active mind during the hours of darkness. That's always been the case for me, and before I had children, just sleeping during the day and working at night helped me keep my brain from melting due to exhaustion from lack of sleep.