Aversion to physical touch

[Armee]

Thank you for expressing this, both Woodsgnome and Cactus Flower.

[NarcKiddo]

 

I think this is a fascinating subject, particularly in the different ways it impacts us. I'm going through a lot of medical checks at the moment which of necessity involve touch which is usually unpleasant even when done with kindness and respect. It is very mentally draining.

Today I have been thinking about other aspects of touch. For instance, I have heard that many people find weighted blankets very soothing. I have heard, indeed, that some people with autism find it very soothing to be in a small, confined space, touching the sides. This does not surprise me. I have not experimented with a weighted blanket but I do have to sleep under a duvet even if the weather is hot. I also have to wear a vest (camisole undergarment) under my clothing even on the hottest days. I find the full-body contact of a snug-fitting item of clothing to be very soothing, so long as it does not hinder movement. I am in eternal debt to whoever invented elastane and lycra!

[Kizzie]

It's seems like you give yourself an ongoing self-hug NK, feelings of being grounded without the actual hugging/touching from others. I know dogs who are quite anxious soothe when they are given a calming coat to wear. Anyway, it all seems to tell the nervous system "hey you're safe and comforted, not free floating in chaos".  I don't know if anyone watched the show Big Bang Theory but I remember the character Leonard telling the gang he had built a hugging machine when he was young because his parents did not ever hug him.

Cactus Flower - I agree about it seeming like the whole world thinks we should all want sex. I used to cringe and feel guilty/different until I came across some sites for those who are asexual. Like Complex PTSD, once again I feel like I belong to a different sort of tribe and that it's OK to be who I am.

[CactusFlower]

I highly recommend the weighted blanket. I was lucky enough to find one being given away in a local Facebook group that was the right weight (it's supposed to be 10% of your body weight) and it's really pretty. I got under it during a freak-out and was stunned. I couldn't even explain why it worked, but I did calm down and felt better much faster than normal. Maybe the stimulation distracts your brain? I don't know. I can't really use it when it's warm out, though, at least not for long.

I've thought about "touch starved" and "touch averse". I generally don't willingly touch anyone but my bro and my BFF, and I accept touch from them. They're definitely the only ones I hug. I don't feel like I'm touch starved, but that might be my brain saying that it's better than touch with ulterior motives. I can deal with handshakes to be polite, but things like hugging in workshops? I do not like that, it feels forced and phony to me. There are a few very close friends I've known for decades that I would hug, but they don't live anywhere near me.