Does this ever happen to you?!

[Blueberry]

My writing is many times not cohesive so bear with me. I sometimes draw with colored pencils as its hard sometimes to put words to the feelings and mood, colors seem more descriptive and less confusing.  I've been moved lately to draw a road or path that is the time my sobriety from alcohol and  drugs started to now. its a long time i got sober sept 6, 1982. The colors that I was  moved to use are interesting, kinda all over the place when I started living without alcohol and drugs but there is a significant darkness to the colors in 1989 when i first started having serious body memories and flashbacks.

When I let myself go e.g. in trance-like state, my writing is not so cohesive either. I sometimes also use colour to get my mood down on paper. Usually abstract or at best symbolic. Anyway, whatever works for you and for me and for anybody on here. I think if you're in touch with some part of yourself, you'll feel what you need (some of the time anyway lol) and it may be something not often mentioned in trauma therapy. Though I have been inpatient where the trauma patients have been in various types of art therapy, so not unheard of either.

[SteveM]

Laundry Update:
So I got some helpful suggestions and thoughts about my laundry experiences......when I walked by the laundry room yesterday it dawned on me , that I always have a choice about what to do and what not to do. I knew there was laundry in the dryer and I chose not to go in the room and open the dryer and fold it, I just kept on with my day. Today I decided to go in and fold the laundry, it was just another household task I did today with no resistance or triggers.
Not sure I've ever seen this clearly that I always have a choice about what I do or don't do in my own home.
The house I live in today and for the last 32 years is a safe zone and free of any history of abuse and violence. I'm powerful here and not powerless like I was in the different houses I grew up in.


On a somewhat related note we have a new baby granddaughter, my daughter in law and son and child are healthy and safe and I'm grateful for that!!!

My son is a kind and respectful man, husband and now father, this baby girl is very very lucky I'm wicked proud of him.

[Moondance]

Congratulations on all counts SteveM.

[Kizzie]

Oh that's lovely Steve, so glad to hear your wonderful news.  And isn't that something you raised a kind and respectful young man?  It seems the intergenerational transmission of abuse has stopped with you         

[NarcKiddo]

What a lovely, positive update SteveM.

[Armee]

Way to go Steve M! 

[Blueberry]

So happy for you Steve! Great progress and realisations with the laundry folding   Congrats on new baby granddaughter!

[Papa Coco]

Steve

Congratulations on the new granddaughter!  And what a great thing to be able to say that your son is a kind and respectful man, who you are wicked proud of. My grandsons are my life. And my son, their father, like yours, is someone I'm also wicked proud of. So I know what a joy it is to be able to say the things you've said about your son and his family.

I have two sons. One is mentally ill and has estranged from us, but the other is like your son. His love for his family makes me so proud I could burst. So, I know how good it feels to be proud of him.

And congratulations on figuring out why folding the laundry was a Flashback producer. That was a pretty impressive process you went through to figure it out.

Enjoy your new granddaughter, and your new ability to fold laundry without breaking into a cold sweat, (ha ha).