When therapy is an EF trigger?

[Jazzy]

After reading some posts here, I've been thinking about my own situation in a different way than I usually do. One thing I wish is that I could actually get some therapy. I've tried numerous times, but it never works. My psychiatrist keeps telling me I need to go, etc.

I feel really ashamed about having CPTSD, and I've only told a grand total of 2 people (3 if you count my psychiatrist). I know it's something I need to work on, and I'd appreciate any advice or resources on the matter. I think I can work through it over time though, at least it feels like an approachable problem. However, there's another one which seems to be unmanageable for me. Basically, it is what the subject says.

Most of the therapy available to me is group therapy, and group therapy is always an EF trigger for me. It's way too similar to group ... other stuff... when I was a child...  but what can I do about it? I guess I'm told to go to therapy, and I'd like the help that therapy is supposed to provide, but every time I've tried,  I'm triggered and feel way worse instead of better afterwards. I'd really appreciate anything that might help.

Thanks
Jazzy

[Tee]

  I'm not sure that I could group therapy. Groups are triggering for me too.  I'm not sure how to suggest help.  But offer a supportive hug.

[Jazzy]

Thanks Tee 

[Not Alone]

I would find group therapy triggering also. You said "most options are group therapy." Are there other options for you?

[woodsgnome]

While I've done mostly solo work with a therapist, occasionally I have stretched my comfort zone by participating in a couple of carefully chosen groups.

I had a fair experience, especially in finding validation, empathy and trust from other group members. A huge part of the good vibes were due to the background of the group leader in trauma and other potential sensitive areas, and I made sure to check into that before trying the group route.

She was upfront about her experience and approach. While I'm still leery of groups as a whole, if I was to do another I'd again want to inquire in advance about the leader's background in handling trauma and other difficult matters.

All things considered, though, my experiences in solo therapy have been more ideal for my issues. Starting with the obvious -- there's more opportunity for individual work than having to consider group dynamics. I held back, for instance, partly for fear of falling apart, although that did indeed happen a couple of times. These were delicately handled by the leader, but probably not as well as might have been the case without the group structure. Related to this, within the group there's often not much time for follow-up like happens in solo work.

Like so much, it's a pretty individualistic thing, but one-to-one therapy seems more suited for people whose issues involve raw trauma that can be easily triggered via a group setting. And a final important consideration, it seems, is that groups are very dependent on the other participants, which can be extremely variable.

[Jazzy]

Thanks for sharing woodsgnome. If I do try group therapy again I'll be sure to look in to the background of who is leading it, as you suggest. The variable of other group participants is a big unknown, which is scary, to be honest. It is good to hear you had a decent experience.

Notalone, I've tried 1:1 therapy a few times, and it has been "not much better" to "even worse". Partly because of who the therapist is/how they operate, and partly because I've just never been able to feel okay talking to anyone. I think it has something to do with this area/culture/accepted practices, as I've heard of people with far better therapists than I've been able to find around here. So I guess the short answer is no, or at least I don't know of any better options.