Moderate a forum

[Lingurine]

Okay, watch this...

Agreed to moderate this forum, get an anxiety attack, convinced I am not good enough, doubt myself. Write some crazy stuff, doubt myself again, feel very upbeat because they think I'm good enough, doubt myself again, do I feel I'm good enough? Write a poem, support somebody new, go to sauna because of an anxious feeling to get out of the house and, relax man! Arrive back at home, think about moderating some more, watch a really fun topic from clarity, very inspired to write my own chaos down, cry a little, listen to some music and play a videogame while not try to think of it so much. Really convince myself that I'm good enough, Sigh...

Lingurine

[Hope66]

Hi Lingurine,
I really think you're doing a great job at moderating.  :-)
Also, I wanted you to know how much I have appreciated seeing the quote you have on the bottom of your sign off from Sylvia Plath - it has really helped me. 
Hope 

[Elphanigh]

Lingurine,

I think you are going to be an amazing moderator. I was really glad when I saw you had volunteered. You are always so helpful and kind on here. That is the perfect combination for someone to moderate. I have faith that you are more than good enough. You are an amazing person, with such a caring heart. 

[Lingurine]

Thank you Hope66 and Elphanigh, I needed some reassurance. Also I thought it was a good idea to give some insight because we all suffer from the same thing, including insecurities.  I lifted myself out of my depression while writing it, so 

Lingurine

[Kizzie]

Oh dear Lingurine           Thank you for sharing your insecurities, it does help remind us that we all struggle with them.

I'd encourage you to just be yourself and let that bright light that is you shine out here at OOTS.  You are more than good enough, you are perfect just as you are.  We all are.

[Three Roses]

I still go thru this! Convinced I'm too _____ (fill in the blank) to be any good to anyone at anything. Have to listen to my brain and not my IC.

[Lingurine]

Thank you Kizzie and Three Roses, it's a good thing we are equals here and help each other as such. I manage and are also very happy to belong here, with all the people of this beautiful forum.

for all of you here.

Lingurine

[Blueberry]

I was really touched you wrote this, Lingurine, because I was asked about moderating and turned it down because of all the triggering it's likely to result in for me. Then I read that it's tough for you too in some moments! I find it really brave that you open up and put your feelings about it on the forum. That was one of the problems for me - where would I go with all the feelings that might get churned up??? I wouldn't have dared put them on the forum, but you have

[sanmagic7]

lingurine, i think you absolutely have all the right stuff to be a great moderator.  everything i've ever read of yours has been caring and insightful (you, too, 3 roses and kizzie), and i think that's what's important here.  plus, we're all here to support you in this.  thanks for posting the other side of moderating - it just shows the realness of you.  well done!  big hug to you.

[Lingurine]

Thank you Blueberry an Sanmagic, this step I made to write it down here, made my heart light and bright again. The freedom to be myself is back because all of you understood. I allowed myself to be vulnerable because I think vulnerability makes us all human and approachable.

All of you, whenever you need me, I'll be here for you too guys.

Lingurine

[Kizzie]

    and    Lingurine.