Hi ! Just joining

[LuCh1006]

I am a married 70 year old woman.
I grew up afraid of my father because he would raise his voice make a scary face. As I got older, I just learned to do everything he asked the right way and then go to my room. I read comic books , listened to music, all styles.

The first time I said I love you to my Dad was right before he took me down the aisle. I told myself I had to say this to him before I got married. I did and he said he loved me and then we walked.

I went to college met my husband and fell in love because he listened to me and shared my love for music.

We married , shortly (1 year)in we had beautiful little girl  and 2 years later a beautiful son. We bought a house we could not afford that I did not want to buy but agreed. And this is where it all began because I was not in favor of overextending ourselves but he pushed and I gave in and I kept doing that over and over. I thought I was doing ok but then He became abusive in his speech and in his actions toward me criticizing everything. Then, my husband lost his vision and I had to take care of everything.

He stared accusing me of seeing other men and just got worse and worse. I was about to go crazy when the only thing I could see was to go to therapy. I learned about CPTSD and Narcissistic Abuse and it blew my mind and I was so hurt.

So I am still in the marriage and still trying to get out of it. I left out so many things but I just want to hear about other experiences to be sure I am not missing something.

I am honored to be here and hope to learn more!

[Alice362]

Hello,

I am so sorry to hear you are going through this. I have also recently awakened to the fact that I have been suffering my husband's narcissistic abuse, for decades. You are not alone. The dismissal of my mental health was the catalyst for me. That realization alone has brought many feelings that can cycle so rapidly at times, you wonder if this is actually really happening to you.

The rage and shame can seem endless. I find it most difficult to accept that I was unable or unwilling to see what has been right in front of me all of this time. Denial is so damaging.

I am also still in the marriage, and have two grown children. You are not alone.

 

[NarcKiddo]

Welcome. I'm sorry you have endured such difficulties in your marriage. I'm glad you started therapy and that you found us.

[Kizzie]

Hi and a very warm welcome to Out of the Storm LuCH!

I am so sorry to hear about what you've gone through, but glad for you know what it was you went through and that you are trying to make a better life for yourself now. It's tough and I really hope you are find your way through all this because while scary in the end breaking free let's you start a new life.

    

[TheBigBlue]

Welcome LuCH

I'm late to the welcome party, but glad you found us. I'm sorry for all you've been through and hope you find some understanding, support, and shared experiences here as you find your way forward.