Meeting with a new therapist suggestions for questions?

[beet]

I'm meeting with an new possible Therapist this week. We've talked once on the phone and he seems nice and a potentially good fit but I was wondering if anyone had suggestions for questions I should ask him in preparation?

[NarcKiddo]

I think I'd want to know whether the T is experienced in dealing with trauma. Ideally with CPTSD but that can be a big ask.

I'd also want to know what sort of approaches the T tends to use. Is it CBT, psychodynamic or whatever. People here mention EMDR as being helpful (I have never tried it) so it might be worth asking if they can do that, or are happy to recommend others for particular things if appropriate.

Of course there's the obvious administrative things like payment policies, cancellation policies etc.

I lucked out with my T. I asked none of these questions and initially started with her on an online platform with a CBT approach. I picked her out because I liked her photo!

[Armee]

Something that has really stood out to me as important is how willing he is to listen and learn and adapt approaches. Like NK, I really lucked out with my first and only T. When i started with him he was CBT-based and into quick results. CBT is NOT a good fit for complex trauma. What allowed this therapeutic partnership to really work was that he listened and adapted when things weren't working and was willing to learn new approaches and to adapt them based on what worked and didn't work for me. 

I'd ask something like: if a particular method isn't working for a client, how do you proceed? If you found your client needed a different approach would you refer out or try to learn new methods? How do you think about therapeutic resistance? (Some old school therapists think if something isnt working it is because a client is "resistant" and doesn't want to get better). I'd also ask what treatment time frame they think is needed for someone with complex trauma and if there is a certain amount of time they would give someone before referring them out.

Ideally I'd look for someone who can do EMDR themselves (i find it helpful to do emdr with someone else who really understands my issues rather than going to someone different), who is experienced with COMPLEX trauma, and who is comfortable working  with parts...IFS or otherwise. Mindfulness is also helpful as noticing what is going on inside is critical to the  healing process. 

Hope that is somewhat helpful. I've been in therapy for almost 8 years with the same therapist with fantastic progress even if it is slower than he has ever had to deal with. 😬

[Blueberry]

Seconding Armee!

These days I tend to ask a new T if they know everything/ have all the answers. If they say something like "I don't know your history, I have to ask about that." End of. This T is not for me! I need them to answer something along the lines of: they help me, support me guide me, but the answers are in me, we discover them together.

[wooboyattachmenttrauma]

I agree with all of the above suggestions. Some questions I wished I had asked are around ruptures and boundaries and feedback and treatment plan. How often will be circle back to our treatment plan to discuss progress and what we're working on? How do you foster a collaborative working relationship? What are your policies around out-of-session contact? How will you respond when I tell you that I'm feeling bad in the relationship, or didn't like something that you did or said, or it doesn't feel like it's working? Can you give me an example of how you handled a situation like that in the past?

[Kizzie]

Hey Beet, we have some forms and resources that might be useful here - https://www.outofthestorm.website/downloads.
Note that there's one "Locating a Therapist" that has questions you can ask.

Good luck!

Kizzie