Want to make sure I'm identifying these correctly

[cflage]

I'm reading up in this forum about EFs. Maybe I don't fully understand them yet. I do have what are undeniably flashbacks of some kind. But I don't really lose control of my emotional functioning in my day to day when they get triggered. I do have a recollection of a past memory and an emotional reaction, and in response sometimes I reflexively and without thinking will take a very deep breath and cleansing sigh, or I will mutter "it's okay now, let it go," or "they can't hurt you anymore" without even being aware I have said it out loud. The things I re-experience are rarely the same event over and over, nor are they even all events that occurred while I was being victimized, but they are remembered events that all have a common theme of being unwanted, humiliated, or forgotten.

This happens in all kinds of locations:  at work, or while I'm petting the cat, or when I'm in the shower, or in the car, making dinner, just everywhere. I haven't kept count of how often, but I would estimate dozens of times a day if I haven't had CBD oil.  If I am not 100% dedicated to a task or a set of tasks (sometimes I occupy myself with 3 monitors at the same time), then I'm likely to start re-experiencing things within a matter of minutes.

Is it accurate to call this EFs, or is something else going on here? Trying to do my homework on this before taking my next steps.

[woodsgnome]

Sometimes it's as if the mind is like a big roaring waterfall crashing down around one's being. Tumbling out of this roaring tumult certain memories can fall and, with no apparent reason, resonate and/or interact with memories buried deep within. So whether it's precisely like the original event, some little trigger -- a look from someone, a comment, even hearing a certain word (this often happens to me) or something seemingly not related -- can cause these sorts of reactions.

I'd definitely not expert in this, as to whether this fits the precise definition, but words in this area are hard to come by anyway. Yet they're affecting you, and somewhat like my reactions, they can even be delayed, but they often ring a bell. To me, that's emotional flashback territory. I just try and not allow them to overtake the rest of me, that says I'm still OK, safe, and a survivor but not a victim. I hope you can find similar portals in which to be, if not fully soothed, at least tolerant with the temporary effects.

I suppose that temporary quality does, after all, make them flash-backs, in that they come and go, sometimes even when it doesn't seem like they're directly connected to a present situation. Bottom line is -- they're still there, and it sounds like you're at least catching wind of some of them and emotionally flashing back.

Anyway, welcome aboard and here's hoping you'll continue the process of learning and growing from this all. 

[Kizzie]

Emotional flashback is a term coined by Pete Walker but it falls under the CPTSD symptom "re-experiencing" which is when past trauma crowds into consciousness in whatever form.

Some people have very visual flashbacks to a specific traumatic incident while others like me just 'flashback' to the feelings we had when we were abused as children.  Flashbacks can range in intensity from mild to severe which will affect the degree to which you are incapacitated by it. It may be that yours will lose intensity and frequency as you work on recovery, that's what happened for me I'm happy to say.