the next step

[HannahOne]

 

[sanmagic7]

thank you for your kind words, armee.  really.

thanks for the hug, hannah1.  and back atcha! 

i'm quite worn out today, had a bunch of stuff i was going to do and just thinking about all of them last nite i knew it was too much.  i have to pick up more thera-flu for my D - she's still congested and coughing and it's interfering w/ her sleep, which isn't good, and she still has a low-grade fever.  i also have a Rx to pick up for myself from a different place.  go to the food bank. and visit w/ my galpal, see her cousin whom i haven't seen for 40 yrs., and who is a staunch political advocate. 

as i was thinking of all this last nite, it washed over me that i can't possibly do it all.  going to my galpal's includes 1/2 of driving one way.  so, i began ticking off things i can put off till sat., and now the only things i'm gonna do is get the medicine and go chat w/ the girls.  plus hair and makeup, which i've only begun doing when i go somewhere, but it's still energy used.

can't wait till tomorrow.  i can rest.  my D is apologizing all over the place for being sick, and she knows she doesn't need to, but she also feels bad that i've had to do all this running around to make sure she's getting what she needs.  i haven't driven this much in a week in so many years, probably the last time was when i took off for mexico.

but birds are singing this morning - that's my music, and one of them is a robin, and i love that. so, i've got a smile on my face in spite of everything.

[NarcKiddo]

I'm glad you have been able to care for yourself by thinking about what can wait. I'm also glad that part of your plans remain going to spend some time with the girls. And I'm glad you've got a smile on your face.

  

[Blueberry]

 

Seconding NK.

i'm quite worn out today, had a bunch of stuff i was going to do and just thinking about all of them last nite i knew it was too much. 

This caught my eye because so familiar to and for me.    on acting on that today too, paring down what can wait till Sat.

I like that you're doing hair and makeup tho that's mostly not my thing at all but when it occasionally has been, it has touched parts/aspects in me that are mostly not touched, in a beneficial way. I hope it is similar for you.

[Papa Coco]

San,

I agree. It's nice that you are able to let yourself handle just what needs to be done and let the rest slide a day or two. Your D sounds like a real sweetheart to be so concerned about all you're doing for her. I always get a sense that there is a great deal of love between the two of you.

 

[sanmagic7]

thanks, NK.  the smile is mostly still there.  actually, 'the girls' thing got cancelled, which enabled me to get medicine for my D and go to the food bank, which i'm glad of cuz we needed it, but it is a hassle nonetheless, and would've been too much next to the drive to my galpal's place.  i have a Rx waiting, but that'll wait till tomorrow.  'the girls' are now scheduled for next tues. and i think that timing will be better all the way around.  so, things work out sometimes, right? 

thank you blueberry, for your support - always appreciated.  the hair and makeup is quite new, and in fact, i've even added foundation now - it seems that as we get older our complexions change!!!  i've kind of been noticing but ignoring the blotchiness on my face, but now i'm smoothing it out a bit more, and that feels good.  i couldn't wait to wear makeup when i was in high school, but wasn't allowed (part of not letting me be a girl, which i wanted to be, which i was but not allowed to express very much).  so, the hair and makeup is me reclaiming my girl-ness.  never too late, right?

PC, thank you so for the support.  my D IS a real sweetheart, and because of that i've been able to learn to lean on someone, finally, which feels really nice.

i've been so activated by what i've read this morning that i did my door stretch, moved my feet back and forth, and lifted weights.  i can feel the movement my muscles have gone thru and it feels really good. 

and suddenly there's a feeling inside, in my gut area, like something wants to be vomited out.  where did that come from?

[NarcKiddo]

 

[HannahOne]

Glad you could get medication and the food!

the hair and makeup is quite new, and in fact, i've even added foundation now -

Hooray for embracing who you feel you are, being allowed to express that, and experimenting with your appearance to feel comfortable in your skin!    You're allowed to be YOU.