Recent posts
#51
Recovery Journals / Re: starting over
Last post by sanmagic7 - September 09, 2025, 02:24:12 PMthanks a ton, blueberry and NK, for the support! yeah, it's really nice to know i'll get some financial help w/ this, even if only for a while. 
very tired lately. it's still so hard to feel relaxed, unless i'm in front of the tv w/ my D, we're watching something easy - my eyes will just start closing, and i have a hard time keeping them open! but, there it is.
my medicaid benefits start in oct., and i'm hoping to find a T thru the network. my D found one she likes, but i don't know if she's a trauma T, and i know i definitely need one of those. talk will only get me so far, altho at least it mite be good for stabilization and grounding. at any rate, we'll cross that bridge when i get to it, but it feels kinda nice to think i may get some help w/ all this. we'll see. (i can feel my mind going all over the place with anxiety now about the hassle of telling my story to someone new, settling in, letting them know what i need, catching a good vibe off them, all of that!!!)
very tired lately. it's still so hard to feel relaxed, unless i'm in front of the tv w/ my D, we're watching something easy - my eyes will just start closing, and i have a hard time keeping them open! but, there it is.
my medicaid benefits start in oct., and i'm hoping to find a T thru the network. my D found one she likes, but i don't know if she's a trauma T, and i know i definitely need one of those. talk will only get me so far, altho at least it mite be good for stabilization and grounding. at any rate, we'll cross that bridge when i get to it, but it feels kinda nice to think i may get some help w/ all this. we'll see. (i can feel my mind going all over the place with anxiety now about the hassle of telling my story to someone new, settling in, letting them know what i need, catching a good vibe off them, all of that!!!)
#52
Please Introduce Yourself Here / Re: Hello
Last post by NarcKiddo - September 09, 2025, 01:27:36 PMWelcome, RogerP. I'm glad you found us. Of course it is fine just to read but I'm happy you dropped in to say "hello" all the same. 
#53
Recovery Journals / Re: Healing self and child
Last post by Yael - September 09, 2025, 01:25:36 PMhttps://youtu.be/gmM8JNXvWxA?feature=shared
Song of Ren and Token (rap) about difficult love after abuse.
Song of Ren and Token (rap) about difficult love after abuse.
#54
Recovery Journals / Re: Healing self and child
Last post by Yael - September 09, 2025, 12:58:18 PMThanks.
I'm really proud. My social worker said it too. He said I listen well to his advice, weight it carefully against my own self, then respond with what I can (or can't) take from it calmly. I think it's also a result of growing a stronger self.
My family is very "I am perfect I did no wrong ever". I hated that. I tried to really grow in this respect. I think it important to my kid. I'm proud of him too. He's a young teen. But he too can take feedback better and better. Sometimes with a joke and sometimes with calmly explaining. But I notice he does hear me. And take responsibility.
I'm really proud. My social worker said it too. He said I listen well to his advice, weight it carefully against my own self, then respond with what I can (or can't) take from it calmly. I think it's also a result of growing a stronger self.
My family is very "I am perfect I did no wrong ever". I hated that. I tried to really grow in this respect. I think it important to my kid. I'm proud of him too. He's a young teen. But he too can take feedback better and better. Sometimes with a joke and sometimes with calmly explaining. But I notice he does hear me. And take responsibility.
#55
Please Introduce Yourself Here / Hello
Last post by RogerP - September 09, 2025, 12:27:36 PMI'm here probably to read mostly. I am a senior with a six decade history of PTSD. I often manage but still have extended periods of multiple symptoms. I am happy to have found this forum.
#56
Recovery Journals / Re: Healing self and child
Last post by NarcKiddo - September 09, 2025, 12:11:01 PMHello Yael. It's good to see you back. I'm glad you are proud of what your therapist said - you should be. It is a really hard thing to take difficult feedback on board without getting defensive.
#57
Recovery Journals / Re: Healing self and child
Last post by Yael - September 09, 2025, 11:43:21 AMOh and I am proud. My therapist said, yesterday, that she was suprised. That she could say a lot to me. Feedback. Even critical feedback. Critical questions. And that I easily reflected or saw her perspective if her feedback made sense. That I wasn't defensive.
That's one of the traits I tried to purge from myself: defensiveness. I try to really hear someone's criticism and reflect. If I think it makes sense, I do something with it. If it doesn't I honestly and gently give that back.
I am proud of that.
That's one of the traits I tried to purge from myself: defensiveness. I try to really hear someone's criticism and reflect. If I think it makes sense, I do something with it. If it doesn't I honestly and gently give that back.
I am proud of that.
#58
Recovery Journals / Re: starting over
Last post by NarcKiddo - September 09, 2025, 11:31:26 AMI'm really happy you got access to medicaid and paid prescriptions. 
#59
Successes, Progress? / Re: new apartment & therapy
Last post by NarcKiddo - September 09, 2025, 11:29:32 AMI hope the move went well and you are settling in comfortably. Best of luck with the new therapy provider.
#60
Recovery Journals / Re: Healing self and child
Last post by Yael - September 09, 2025, 09:53:28 AMThe therapist had a nice quote. She says: we have a big front window and a tiny mirror for looking back. That's what life is supposed to be. A lot of looking ahead, only a bit of looking back.