Messages

Hope you get some emotional, mental and physical rest. 

  For being educated, informed, and for standing up for yourself. 

Ecowarrior,
Wondering how you are doing?

I feel for you, laying in bed shivering. It is so hard when the feelings are so big. Glad you were able to take a bath. Sounds like a soothing, nurturing thing to do. 

Thank you for showing your painting. It is a beautiful way for you to share your journey and your heart.

Sounds like you're having one of those days when everything is hard. I so get that! When I have things that really need to get done, I set small goals. Sometimes I work on it for 15 minutes and I set a timer. A couple of days ago I had an area that I needed to clean. I was really overwhelmed. I asked myself, "Can you take this one box downstairs?" Yes, and then other boxes followed. Baby steps with a lot of self-care and compassion.   

Blueberry,
Please be kind to yourself. 

It sounds like your gut is telling you that his communication with you is inappropriate and manipulative. I think your gut is right. Trust your instincts.

Welcome, Redwing. 

Ecowarrior & Johnram: Thank you for your support. Nice to have people who understand.

I can see the pain in your face (drawing). 

"What is a friend?" Heavy question with many layers of answers. I have friends with various levels of intimacy. My closest friends, even though most have not experienced abuse, have (and still) experienced pain. They have felt their pain and they don't try to talk me out of my pain. They feel with me and for me. They pray for me. They tell me they are for me. They tell me they are sorry I am hurting and they mean it. Yesterday a friend came to my house and spent several hours with me because I was having a tough time. They are comfortable with me telling them as much or as little as I need to tell. They tell me their struggles. Some of them hold me. Most of those close relationships are with people whom I have known for over a decade. Some are more recent. Sometimes they miss the boat on what I need and sometimes I am amazed at their wisdom and discernment. I don't know if this helps. Building friendships takes time and dedication from both people. As a friendship is first developing, I "test the waters." I hear and watch how they respond to people or situations. I might share something that is a small risk. If it is received well, I might share more. If not, I am cautious and either give it another try or keep that friendship on a more surface level.

Sending you support on this difficult day. I hope you eat, sing, exercise, watch T.V., read and draw to "celebrate!"

Thank you everyone for your support. A friend came over and spent several hours with me, which was helpful. Still have some guilt over calling in, but trying not to let that overwhelm me. It would have been really hard to pulled it together today to work.

Those are really big insights and understandings. I'm pretty much in the same place as you. Definitely not a solo journey. I could not continue to do this without my family, friends, therapist and this group. Just today a friend came over and spent several hours with me because I was really struggling. Thanks for sharing here and keep reaching out to others.