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Hey everyone, thanks for answering. I haven't been on this site for a few weeks. I've been too busy getting mad at everyone (ha-ha kidding mostly) It does help a small bit to know where the anger comes from and hopefully one day I will learn how to express it in the right situations.

Oops, I skipped this step and already posted, not too great at navigating this site yet. I'm not even sure I've been officially diagnosed with CPTSD. Over the summer I had a breakdown and one late night I did an online search just typing what I was feeling, and info on CPTSD came up. It fits me in some ways but not others. I didn't get abused as a child. I was bullied and rejected, the hated kid. I never felt like I could escape, so maybe that's why I have it, but other people suffered the same thing and don't seem to have it. For years I thought I was borderline and some of the info I read says that's fairly common for cptsd to be misdiagnosed as borderline.
  Whatever I have, it shows up in how I deal with people. I hate people but I need them. I'm always thinking people could be a potential enemy. But I wish I had friends. I have a husband who I'm mean to more than sometimes, even though I wish so much I weren't. Sometimes I'm loving and caring, but other times I go off about nothing. He should have left me but says he won't. I want to work on it for him as well as for me. I have one friend who lives in a different country; she has ptsd, don't know if it's the complex kind. I feel like I'm either mean to people or getting walked on; there's nothing in between. I really hope I can change. I also hope to support other members with cptsd.

Is anyone else with CPTSD angry, like all the time? Or out of the blue? I just found out I have this over the summer, when things got really bad and my reactions to situations were over the top. I began typing in online what I was feeling and CPTSD came up. I went to a therapist I had seen before and she seems to agree, even though I didn't have any major tragedies in my life but was bullied throughout childhood and never felt like I could escape. Now I get pissed at everybody for everything and I don't know how to stop it. I don't know what else I can process about my childhood; I think I've talked about it until I'm blue in the face. Am I brain damaged? Am I doomed to be this way forever? I can't get therapy for awhile because I don't have insurance until January, but I'm not sure what good it would do anyway. I'm one of those people who has believed for years that I'm borderline and this is my personality. I'm still not convinced that's not true.

This may not help but he wouldn't have been good for you if he can't handle your diagnosis. A lot of people don't know what to make of it but the good ones are the people who are at least willing to hang in there and learn.