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I have a terrible time sleeping.  It is terrible. Anybody have any suggestions.... besides benedryl or other drugs that make me have a hangover in the morning.

Thank you all for the encouragement. I started  counseling this week and it was a very good thing. I was encouraged by it and have another appointment this week. I had counseled with this same woman several years ago and she is fantastic.  Explained to me that i was having what she called "feelings flashbacks" and it made a lot of sense. Just know what is going on in my brain makes it less scary. I also talked to her about me taking just half a lorazepam in the morning and how it helps to stave off the anxiety of the day. I have been afraid of being addicted to them but she told me that was not a dose I needed to be concerned about and if it helps to take it. So I will. I am very lucky in that my new husband is very supportive. He and I were together in high school and met again almost 2 years ago after not seeing each other for 23 years.  We just got married in July. He is wonderful.. and I gained 3 step children... I was soo afraid of ever living with anyone again but we have been for quite a while about a year and a half... and all is well between us. So life is good.. I just dont feel good.. but I am going to get there.

Well.. I am new here and am hoping that I can find some help, common ground... something.... My CPTSD comes from being married to, living with and taking care of a schizophrenic sociopath for nearly 18 years. He was a brilliant manipulator, violent, and so many other things that if I go in to all of it I will sit here sobbing for hours. And I dont want to give him the satisfaction of any more of my tears than are necessary. So, anyway, the problem is that although I am free from the relationship and have been for about 4 years now I seem to have developed some problems that I cant seem to control. My mind kind of checks out.. disassociates from what is going on around me. I can function physically but I am not "IN" the moment. Half the time I feel like an emotional wreck and that I am going crazy. And I am mad... very mad! Because I know what caused this. I used to be this strong person that could handle every situation. I was the take charge one. I did it all and could do it all. I now feel weak and unstable and useless half the time. My confidence level is soo stinking low. I feel like I am going crazy but from what I have read it seems that this is normal for this. I also am always trying to please everyone and am terrified of anyone being unhappy with me. I really dont know how to fix this. And I really hate sounding and being so unsure and helpless.