Messages

 

 

computers can make all the difference, for sure!  love and hugs

hope the procedure goes well, rainy.  i think the half day was a good call.  love and hugs

ya know what, DF?  it isn't fair, not at all.  and it wasn't fair that other woman had to spend time in an internment camp. this stuff just isn't fair.

fairness, however, doesn't take away the awfulness of any one person's trauma.  just like us, it's all different.  i think your truth is righteous, and you deserve to speak it.  we don't know what kind of, if any, support that woman had, whereas, like you said, you didn't have the help and support you needed while dealing with your own trauma.

i've heard it said here on the forum that comparing what we went thru to what others went thru is not necessarily a healthy thing.  i've done it too many times, even brought it up to my T.  she reiterated that trauma is trauma, and those of us who have been traumatized have been traumatized, and no one can say which is worse or better. 

love and hugs

and this is the difference between someone truly in recovery and someone who isn't - you sought out that child and apologized.  well done, rainy!   you're a beautiful being, and that kid knows it. 

i hope you get more time w/ your co-worker, too, just because it would feel good to be in the presence of someone on your side.  you've struggled so much w/ this stuff, he sounds like a breath of fresh air.  love and hugs

glad you're getting a little rest time for you, DF, and congrats on asking for help!  well done!

i hate this roller coaster ride of feeling good one day, horrible the next.  it can truly be discouraging.  at times i can remember what so many here have said - this, too, shall pass.  i hope you can as well.  love and hugs

DF, that all sounds so wonderful!  very glad you're having good therapy sessions - so helpful. and i'm loving that attitude - your strength is shining thru the screen.  keep up the good work    love and hugs

  it definitely is!

i also think it brave of you to write about it here, DF.  i now know that a lot of my sexual encounters were directly related to a lack of touch in my childhood, even if i didn't know it at the time.  it's weird at the same time making a lot of sense that our childhood experiences can make a huge impact on how we see other people as adults, and the meanings placed on them in our minds.

i looked up 'limerence' - only you will be able to tell if that's what's going on, but from a trauma perspective, it's interesting, i think.  take care of you with this, ok?  love and hugs

thanks for sharing that youtube channel, hope.  i wrote it down and plan to take a look at it.  i used to do an 8-min. relaxation segment on the internet which was helpful, but for some reason stopped.  i do want to look at this, tho, so i'm glad you shared it.  i hope you're feeling less uncomfy about it.

as always, the many, many books you read/have read astonishes me.  and now you're doing languages as well.  that's amazing, you're amazing!  keep up the good work - the idea that you are more able to deal w/ family/childhood stuff now is a testament to how much you have healed yourself.  i'm so proud of you (if it's ok to say that).  love and hugs 

i've gotten to dread going to see docs for this very reason, NK.  too many are jerks.  very sorry you have to put up with this - it totally sucks.  i hope you do not have cancer and they find something very treatable/curable and easy to manage.  best to you w/ all of it.  love and hugs

yeah, some rest sounds like just the ticket after all that, CF. and i hear you about one day being mostly the same as another when not 'working' at a structured job. it's so true!  weekends don't mean the same to me as to other folks, either.  kinda funny.

hope the whole computer thing goes well and smoothly.  nice that you'll have some help.  love and hugs

good luck w/ the stress coming up, hope.  i think it's wonderful that you can honor your fears.  you do, after all, know what's best for you. love and hugs

i've struggled w/ finding/expressing my emotions as well, lostwanderer. it can be difficult but i also know it's doable.  maybe not in a straight line, but just a little bit at a time, gain it, lose a little, gain some more.  hang in there, ok?  sending love and hugs, if that's ok w/ you. 

it's so discouraging to hear all this, rainy.  really sorry you have to deal with it.  i don't understand people who are in a position to help kids who need extra help having attitudes and ignorance.  ugh! i've long held the theory that most people in the helping professions go by the 'bell jar' vision - 80% of people do, indeed, fall w/in the range of the bell jar, but there is a 10% of people who fall into the little flip on one side, and 10% who fall into the little flip on the other side.  it's these 20% who often get overlooked and are treated as 'normal'.

you are one of the few professionals who are willing to look outside the 'norm' and are able to 'see' the 20% and treat them accordingly.  it's so frustrating to work w/ others who don't.  i know this from experience, both as a colleague and as a client/patient.  know that i hear you and am standing with you.  this ain't easy by any means!

good luck w/ the sleep stuff.  i've been rethinking how to sleep for myself recently.  i hope you find something that works for you.  love and hugs

   congrats to you, CF!  that's amazing!  well done!     love and hugs

i can relate, DF.  we may have gotten some very basic needs met, like shelter, perhaps, but being able to turn to someone for comfort?  i didn't have that, either.  and i think getting into the specifics of what went on for us growing up can be extremely painful to face, and can also take some time to grieve.  i know i still am.

slowly, at your own pace, ok?  i've also learned the hard way that going too fast into this stuff can be overwhelming, which often is not a good thing.  love and hugs