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Hello Jaydubs! I'm also new here so it's nice to meet another newbie.!

It's so good to feel there are other people out there who empathise with what we're going through, even if we haven't told our story. It's can be very lonely in the big wide world, so it's important to connect with people who you can be yourself with.

I'm always available to offload to or simply have a chat, should you ever want to.

Love and hugs

Hi River! Lovely to meet you.
So sorry for all you've suffered.

I understand the need to have therapy....I'm also trying to find someone who can help with my trauma.....but I believe there is also a place for very simple self-nurturing.

You say you're trapped in your apartment much of the time....then maybe start there. Gentle music, candles, incense, bubble baths, herb teas, a good book, yoga/Pilates, meditation etc. Tell yourself you're as worthy as the next person and you're going to treat yourself as such. Learn to love yourself and believe that you're not going to be (can't think of the word! Brain's gone dead!!) 'something'd'(?) by what other people have done or said to you.

I really, really know how it's easier said than done, but no therapy will work unless we can see that we deserve to get better and didn't deserve what we've experienced in the first place.

You're definitely worth it and I send you loads of love and hugs. Hope this helps.

❤️🌹❤️🌹❤️🌹❤️🌹❤️🌹❤️🌹❤️🌹

How would you like to be? Visualise that person and try to start to become them.

Thankyou so much, Three Roses!!! 🙏💐😘

Dear reverie

Congratulations on getting away!!! No one should have to put up with abuse. You've totally done the right thing!!!! Well done!!! 

My daughter and I escaped my abusive husband in January. He was in rehab, so I sold the house, learnt to drive, bought a car and left everything but the two cats. I smuggled my daughter over to France (she couldn't get her passport in time, though she has it now) and we've lived in Paris ever since.

I was really ill when I got here. I had a really bad throat infection but I think my body was telling me that it was time to stop. Both my daughter and I were pretty out of it for the first couple of months and then we gradually became more at ease.

In the last few weeks though, I've developed narcolepsy, a need to wee all the time, mood swings, massive decrease in confidence  and a permanent feeling of panic. My daughter has developed an eating disorder and similar symptoms to mine.

I believe it's because, as life became more settled, our subconscious was given time to process all that we'd been through, all that we'd left behind and the new life we have to face from now on. It's scary to contemplate so much, face your demons and find strategies for moving on, but with help (I attend a very dynamic women's group for survivors of abuse) and time, life can seem full of promise and hope again.

Give yourself time to simply be. Don't try to rush anything. Listen to your body and your mind. The solutions are inside. This is what I've learnt.

Good luck with everything and trust in yourself, because you are a survivor!!!