i can totaly relate. i remember as a young child, maybe 9 or 10 writing out lists that could make me perfect. like brushing my hair 300 times a day, etc. to this day i still have this type of harsh behavior. i remember my parents telling me they found the list but not really discussing it with me. i just felt embarassed they seen them.
i am getting better, but for the longest i thought maybe if i figure out what is causing my low self esteem all of my problems would be solved, and i would be confident in that exact moment. i was completley wrong, but i do think it helped me realize that my train of thought is off, and practicing self love does help. when i think negative harsh thoughts i try to remind myself that no one is perfect, and that there are a lot of great things about myself.
i am recovering, and i hope you find the light at the end of the tunnle. we dont deserve this suffering.
you are not alone!!
i am getting better, but for the longest i thought maybe if i figure out what is causing my low self esteem all of my problems would be solved, and i would be confident in that exact moment. i was completley wrong, but i do think it helped me realize that my train of thought is off, and practicing self love does help. when i think negative harsh thoughts i try to remind myself that no one is perfect, and that there are a lot of great things about myself.
i am recovering, and i hope you find the light at the end of the tunnle. we dont deserve this suffering.
you are not alone!!