Menu

Show posts

This section allows you to view all posts made by this member. Note that you can only see posts made in areas you currently have access to.

Show posts Menu

Messages - Quandary

#1
Thank you, BeHealthy.  That was my decision, too.  He seems to be accepting his mother's refusal to let him visit. He was, however, told to give his paycheck and monthly SS check directly to a brother within 24 hours.  And was not permitted to accept a ride from me to the bank, or to brother's place of business...dispite her awareness that he has been sick for days, it is raining, and the walk is several miles.  It kills me, but I have to honor his journey. These sites have been so helpful to me.  I was, and continue to be,horrified at his willingness to accept what is clearly abuse from almost the entire family. But I am beginning to have a (limited) understanding now, of his reactions. 
The really good news is that he was accepted into college yesterday.  He was scared, thrilled and amazed.  Currently, he says he wants to go.  So we will try to cobble the necessary missing paperwork.  We have no birth certificate, citizenship paperwork, etc..  She will not give him anything.  He needs them for financial aid.  I am going to start with trying to find the county that has his adoption papers.  He, of course, has no idea.  Any suggestions, gratefully received.
#2
Please Introduce Yourself Here / New with questions
April 02, 2015, 07:49:00 PM
I have been a safe house for 3 months for a young man getting ready to graduate high school.  Wonderful, bright, terrific kid, scholmate of my kid, who asked for a safe place so he could finish school.  Slowly learning of the emotional and physical abuse at home.  10 children, all internationally adopted, kept for what I can only understand for welfare purpose.  They are not allowed friends, work 40 hrs week, attend school, give all money to mother.  Father killed himself six years ago.  J is blamed for death, as he was 'last to see him'.  Older brother abuses him physically, with M's approval.  Sound like a crazy novel?  I wish.  Anyway, I am hoping (praying) to get this kid into a college.  So far, so good.  But right now (Easter) he is so depressed that he wants to go home.  He asked to visit for Easter and was told no, unless he comes home to stay.  Other sibs have left, but always end up home again due to finances/ pressure/bad situations.  No one is allowed to ever leave this M...ever.  Controlling doesn't begin to describe it.  He is almost 19.  Any words of wisdom for him or me?  I don't want to be another controlling person in his life, but, omg, he is worth so much more than this.