I'm new here. In fact, this is my first post. But what you describe is EXACTLY why I came here looking for answers. I live a life of cycles, where things are 'normal' and then something happens to trigger me and I go into a tailspin. I'm hopefully coming to the end of my most recent tailspin now, since things seem to be calming down again. This current situation has really opened my eyes to how damaged I am from years of abuse that I didn't properly deal with, and have allowed myself to get into relationships and situations that compound the problem. 
I know this is going to be a long road to recovery, but I'm determined to make it this time. I wish you the best in your journey as well.
I know this is going to be a long road to recovery, but I'm determined to make it this time. I wish you the best in your journey as well.