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Thanks Kizzie, me too.

I can understand it at a cognitive level but it doesn't make it easier, or even okay considering that she's come back from her visits quite abusive herself.  I was afraid of this. She's moving out, and it's best for us all.  I didn't want to have to distance myself from her too, but I can't be thrown back into this again.  It was horrible to sit here and listen to my daughter yell at me saying things like I'm "disgusting".... Something that I would never have dreamed coming out of her lips.  Definitely not something she heard from me...

thank you ThreeRoses, good luck to you as well. 


PS: I'm not sure I know how to reply to the replies...

Hi Kizzie, 
I have told my daughter all about them, I just wasn't specific about how they hurt me to prevent her from being vicariously traumatized.   Part of the reason I'm so angry is that she doesn't seem to care about how this is causing me to regress (I've been doing well for the 4-5 years my FOO have been out of my life).  So now I just feel like a basket case all over again.

Hello,
     I just found this website/forum and have been reading the posts.  I thought I was a crazy person....I'm realizing now that my actions like isolating and staying away from my foo have been acts of self preservation and not just me being crazy.  Recently however, my 20 yr-old daughter has resumed a relationship with my foo and this has brought up a lot of stuff for me.  I feel raw and very angry.  The only thing I want to do is stay away from her too because she's pushing all my buttons now as well.  I will be resuming therapy next week and until then, I'm just taking it one day at a time---feeling like I can hardly breathe though. 
-Yvette