Hello, I'm Olly,
When you finish reading this- please share your favorite reptile if you have one! If you don't like them well... to each their own.
I really don't know how to start this introduction- what's too much info, what's not enough?
Educator, artist, gen-z (mid-20s), writer, libra, likes long walks on the beach- okay, now that's out of the way...
I've been in therapy and psychiatric counseling ever since (at least as far as I can remember) kinder, but it's only in my adulthood that I'm accepting that a lot of my symptoms and unhealthy behaviors are largely attributed to unresolved trauma- neglect, abuse, religious and gender related stuff, and the most recent within the decade- betrayal. I only became aware I had trauma in my teens, as the household I grew up in normalized much of the toxicity that I was exposed to- any suffering was just an act of "martyrdom" we HAD to experience.
On top of this I have anxiety, major depression, autism, and I was diagnosed with D.I.D. a long time ago (it's largely been managed- still on my record though). Honestly I've been tossed around psychiatry so many times, I don't know what is or isn't accurate about my diagnoses. I've had to be brought to hospital/homes three times but, those days are long behind me.
I've been wanting to find a community that could understand and communicate the complexities of trauma, but I've always been afraid to put myself out there. Beyond my therapist, I have nobody who I am comfortable enough to talk about how trauma has affected me. I'm unfortunate to say that my efforts in the past beyond therapy are often met with judgment, shame, or condescension- leading me to further secure the walls around my vulnerability. It's gotten to where I sometimes can't even open up to my therapist because I'm so guarded.
Also, with autism I've been told I come off cold. In one instance described as "venomous", which isn't too bad because I really love reptiles, particularly komodo pit vipers- trimeresurus insularis- to be exact. This said, I truly hope that what I write doesn't get misinterpreted as such. I promise it is something I actively try to pay attention to. And it's why I will read my writing over and over and it will take me forever to send a non-practical text or email.
Oh also yes, happy new years to you all. Good luck to those going to work and/or school again. Those who are retired... enjoy!
When you finish reading this- please share your favorite reptile if you have one! If you don't like them well... to each their own.
I really don't know how to start this introduction- what's too much info, what's not enough?
Educator, artist, gen-z (mid-20s), writer, libra, likes long walks on the beach- okay, now that's out of the way...
I've been in therapy and psychiatric counseling ever since (at least as far as I can remember) kinder, but it's only in my adulthood that I'm accepting that a lot of my symptoms and unhealthy behaviors are largely attributed to unresolved trauma- neglect, abuse, religious and gender related stuff, and the most recent within the decade- betrayal. I only became aware I had trauma in my teens, as the household I grew up in normalized much of the toxicity that I was exposed to- any suffering was just an act of "martyrdom" we HAD to experience.
On top of this I have anxiety, major depression, autism, and I was diagnosed with D.I.D. a long time ago (it's largely been managed- still on my record though). Honestly I've been tossed around psychiatry so many times, I don't know what is or isn't accurate about my diagnoses. I've had to be brought to hospital/homes three times but, those days are long behind me.
I've been wanting to find a community that could understand and communicate the complexities of trauma, but I've always been afraid to put myself out there. Beyond my therapist, I have nobody who I am comfortable enough to talk about how trauma has affected me. I'm unfortunate to say that my efforts in the past beyond therapy are often met with judgment, shame, or condescension- leading me to further secure the walls around my vulnerability. It's gotten to where I sometimes can't even open up to my therapist because I'm so guarded.
Also, with autism I've been told I come off cold. In one instance described as "venomous", which isn't too bad because I really love reptiles, particularly komodo pit vipers- trimeresurus insularis- to be exact. This said, I truly hope that what I write doesn't get misinterpreted as such. I promise it is something I actively try to pay attention to. And it's why I will read my writing over and over and it will take me forever to send a non-practical text or email.
Oh also yes, happy new years to you all. Good luck to those going to work and/or school again. Those who are retired... enjoy!