Hi there, my name is Ray and I'm looking for a little hope and maybe compassion.
I have experienced serious trauma since I was in the womb, and have been actively working to overcome challenges associated with CPTSD for more than 15 years. For the majority of that time, I was managing ok-ish. I am—was—high-functioning. But four years ago, I experienced a cruel betrayal that broke me completely. My inner light is extinguished.
One of the truly difficult aspects of this betrayal is that it revealed the depth of my family's indifference toward me. Since I left their church, the Mormon church, they've strongly insinuated that I deserve every bad thing that has happened to me. I turned to them for support and I was met with dismissal, defensiveness, and outright hostility. I finally understood the saying "there's no hate like Mormon love." It's been about a year since I've gone no contact with them.
Now, I'm all alone in the hardest moments of my life and I don't see a meaningful future for me. It's been so long, too long, and I've had no enduring relief from my CPTSD. If anything, it's gotten worse in the last four years.
I guess my question now is if healing is even possible. I wonder, are there any people out there who have actually healed from CPTSD? What helped you? Is there any hope for me??
I have experienced serious trauma since I was in the womb, and have been actively working to overcome challenges associated with CPTSD for more than 15 years. For the majority of that time, I was managing ok-ish. I am—was—high-functioning. But four years ago, I experienced a cruel betrayal that broke me completely. My inner light is extinguished.
One of the truly difficult aspects of this betrayal is that it revealed the depth of my family's indifference toward me. Since I left their church, the Mormon church, they've strongly insinuated that I deserve every bad thing that has happened to me. I turned to them for support and I was met with dismissal, defensiveness, and outright hostility. I finally understood the saying "there's no hate like Mormon love." It's been about a year since I've gone no contact with them.
Now, I'm all alone in the hardest moments of my life and I don't see a meaningful future for me. It's been so long, too long, and I've had no enduring relief from my CPTSD. If anything, it's gotten worse in the last four years.
I guess my question now is if healing is even possible. I wonder, are there any people out there who have actually healed from CPTSD? What helped you? Is there any hope for me??