Menu

Show posts

This section allows you to view all posts made by this member. Note that you can only see posts made in areas you currently have access to.

Show posts Menu

Messages - Kia1212

#1
Please Introduce Yourself Here / Re: New here
December 01, 2025, 12:03:22 AM
Hi Recovery 68, I am also 68 years old and will be 69 in 2 weeks. Never knew I was complex PTSD until I just burnt out, could not go on at all. It was about 2 years ago. All due to extreme emotional, psychological abuses from my narc ex and family of origin. I went no contact completely last year and I can say I feel better, most days. The hardest thing is knowing that narcs never acknowledge or admit their faults. It took me almost 67 years to see that. But at least I don't have to put up with the no empathy, righteousness of everyone. It was disgusting. Hope you find some inner peace.
#2
Welcome Big Blue, sounds like you have been through a lot. Hope you find some solace here.
#3
Please Introduce Yourself Here / Re: New Member Intro
November 30, 2025, 11:52:23 PM
Welcome. Hope you find some inner peace here. It does help to express your feelings.
#4
Please Introduce Yourself Here / Re: Introduction
November 30, 2025, 11:49:29 PM
Hi DawnMaria - sorry you are suffering. I never imagined in my life that my senior years would be spent recuperating from extreme domestic violence (complex PTSD). Seems like there is an epidemic occurring throughout the world. My opinion is that it is all about patriarchy. Until we recognize it we keep repeating the same old, same old. Hope you find relief from this. It is better to be free of the abusers and that is a great thing! Please find peace.
#5
Yea, for some reason narcs don't like therapist, counselors, psychologists, etc. When I finally did go to therapy at 67 years of age, she said stay away from your family. Period. I knew it was not the normal to be treated like trash every day. Now I know I do matter and they are broken people that are totally clueless to their behaviors. I can only change myself, not them. I tried for many years but it did not work.
#6
Hi - seems to me you are more than surviving at this point, you are thriving. Seems like narcs are everywhere. Same here my whole family are extremely narcissitic and in my opinion psychopathic, as they will never own up to a word they say. And, I met a malignant narc psychopath when I was 14 and he fit in quite well with my family. It took me at 40 to divorce my ex, but the gaslighting, demeaning statements, innuendos, whatever never stopped. Finally at 67 I went no contact w my 5 brothers and sisters because I developed complex ptsd and will never be the same again. I beat myself up about why didn't I know what kind of people they were, but it is a confusing scenario. Sometimes they are nice and most times sadistic and cruel. Hope you heal quickly and lead a "normal" life minus the abusers. Good luck.
#7
Glad that you are investigating the whys of abuse. You will improve your life immensely, not to mention your wife & children too. Good luck on your journey!
#8
Please Introduce Yourself Here / Re: Hello
March 21, 2025, 06:08:13 PM
You have survived a horrendous experience, it will take a while to heal from it. The best thing is talk to someone that is experienced in trauma and abuse healing. It does help to finally get validation that what you experienced was not right and you probably developed complex PTSD. Like you get in war time. It's your nervous system telling you to heal, get help and be kind to yourself, take your time and acknowledge all your feelings. I did not recognize my complex PTSD until I was 67 years old. Abuse affects you mentally and physically, which came as quite a surprise to me. Had no idea. Trust issues are most likely going to take a long time to come back. Now when I look back at my life I realize that I was really naive thinking my family and my ex husband loved me. It's better to be wary for a while until you get better. Good luck in your healing journey. Try to get in touch with domestic abuse shelters they can refer you to some counselors.
#9
Hopefully, your healing will go smoothly. I was with my narc for over 30 years and for some reason I never recognized the extent of my family of origin's narc abuse. It was like a repressed memory, I could not believe that my family was so viscious, and on purpose. It was extreme gaslighting, emotional, psychological & verbal abuse. My mom just kept telling me they were allowed to talk like that to me. It was insane. At 67 years old, I realized I am spending the last part of my life in peace and harmony. I never shut up for over 40 years defending myself, always considered myself to be tough, etc. But unfortuately Complex ptsd happened and I recognized the extent of it. I am angry that I am not able to enjoy my later years because of this abuse. It has affected me physically, emotionally, and spiritually. Trying my best to get through. Sucks how people can really believe they have a right to make you feel bad about yourself, when they are the ones that are sick. Hope you succeed in your journey~
#10
Please Introduce Yourself Here / Re: Hi, everyone
January 27, 2025, 04:15:14 PM
Horrible way to grow up, you did not deserve to be treated that way! Hopefully, you can get therapy to see your parents are the reason you experienced this treatment. Please try to find ways to be good to yourself, it helps believe me. And, most importantly stay away from your parents.
#11
Welcome Lina! Right place to be to be healed. Thank god for the internet. Therapists are just coming to realize the impact of abuse, emotional, psychological, etc. and it feels good to know that what I experienced was very abusive, but I was just dealing with a lot of psychopathic people, who would never admit to being wrong or abusive. Hope you find peace.
#12
Hi SolveEtCoagula - welcome! Lots of knowledge on this website. Hope you find some sort of solace. It helps to be validated by others, especially from gaslighting abuse. That was my * on earth for over 30 years. Took me until I was quite old to realize that wasn't love in any shape or form. It was hate. Therapy helps a lot too! Good luck.
#13
Please Introduce Yourself Here / Re: Hello - Part 1
January 02, 2025, 11:16:41 PM
Papa Coco - I am eternally grateful for the internet! Who knew all of the relevant information would be available about narcissistic bullies. It feels so good to finally be validated and acknowledged. It was a long time coming.
#14
Welcome Lina, you found the right spot. I don't think of it as having issues, it's more likely you are the truth teller of your family. And I am glad you are getting the healing required. It gets better after a while. Just takes time. I also am trying to see more joy in life, which will come back after healing from the sadness of living with and around abusive people. So my life is currently peaceful and greatly appreciated at this time.
#15
I am 68 years old and know that you do develop symptoms as you get older. This all occurred in 2022, after getting the covid vaccine, which is a factor. I had my heart checked out, and CT lung scan. Which shows the copd.  There is no blood work or diagnostic test for complex ptsd, just symptoms of extreme fatigue, never ever feeling capable or strong enough to do anything.  I just get in the car sometimes and go shopping, I have to use the cart to help me walk. It is incredibly debilitating. Numerous body, muscle aches and brain fog. When I asked my primary if there were tests to better diagnose the ptsd, he said no. I had no idea that years of gaslighting and emotional abuse could cause physical ailments. It a warning for people staying in these relationships, they literally leave you spiritless, and hollow.