I'm single and haven't been in a relationship or gone on a date in ten years. I haven't had any real friendships either. I have trust issues and feel like it would be difficult to explain to other people why I'm not doing more with my life. Maybe that's just because my family always put expectations on me even after I became mentally/physically sick. Another obstacle was my mother, who I've been living with. Based on past experience, I know that whoever I chose to be around wouldn't be good enough for my mother, so my decision to associate with them would be judged.
I've only ever worked low-paying jobs. Earlier this year, I had to go on non-paid medical leave. I'm not making any money, but I also finally got out of my mother's place. (She kicked me out, but I also wanted to leave; I won't go into detail because I'm trying to keep this post brief.) I thought that things would get better when I got away from my mother, but it seems like little really changed. I find myself being unable to care about my future. The idea of doing job interviews always terrifies me.
The other day, I was reading about a growing trend of younger men dating older women. Among other reasons, it is because older women can provide more financial stability. I never really considered dating someone older than me. (There are so many unofficial "rules" my mother made that still reverberate around in my head.) Anyway, it got me thinking that maybe it's actually my best path forward.
The problem is that, in addition to all the things which prevent me from taking action, I have to wonder if this idea is dangerous. After all, wouldn't I be opening myself up to the same kind of manipulation which got me here in the first place? Is it crazy to think that there could be someone out there who would care to help me with my problems when no one else will?
I've only ever worked low-paying jobs. Earlier this year, I had to go on non-paid medical leave. I'm not making any money, but I also finally got out of my mother's place. (She kicked me out, but I also wanted to leave; I won't go into detail because I'm trying to keep this post brief.) I thought that things would get better when I got away from my mother, but it seems like little really changed. I find myself being unable to care about my future. The idea of doing job interviews always terrifies me.
The other day, I was reading about a growing trend of younger men dating older women. Among other reasons, it is because older women can provide more financial stability. I never really considered dating someone older than me. (There are so many unofficial "rules" my mother made that still reverberate around in my head.) Anyway, it got me thinking that maybe it's actually my best path forward.
The problem is that, in addition to all the things which prevent me from taking action, I have to wonder if this idea is dangerous. After all, wouldn't I be opening myself up to the same kind of manipulation which got me here in the first place? Is it crazy to think that there could be someone out there who would care to help me with my problems when no one else will?