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Like many of you there are many things that trigger me and I go into a spiral.

-Going to the doctor and talking about my medical history
-Funerals, hospitals, family gatherings
-Feeling like I am wrong, incorrect or don't have an answer = I am not smart
-Feeling like I am a burden
-Feeling like I am too emotional (which just sends me into a spiral of guilt and shame and shutting down)
-Feeling like my pain is causing others pain (makes me tend to not open up and do a lot of shielding)

EDMR is helping a lot with these feelings. I really can't say enough positive things about that type of therapy and I've tried many others. That one seems to be helping me desensitize (the D in EDMR) when I have these triggers come up. It's not that this takes away the memory or even the feeling, it just no longer takes the breath out of me, or makes me overwhelmed by my emotions.

PaperFlower

Hi Winter,

Welcome to the forum. I'm so sorry that you had those events happen in your life. No one should have to have that happen to them and not be believed and supported. And I'm sorry you're feeling isolated and alone. I'm so glad that you have found a therapist to help you. I hope that you can also find some resources and support here.

I have also felt a lot of isolation in the last few years for obvious COVID reasons but also just out of fear of being hurt again. I also have trouble with the anxiety/isolation cycle. Mine is due to abandonment and trust issues from childhood and failed relationships so I understand how hard that is. What has helped me is I have found some very supportive online groups, a wonderful therapist, EDMR treatment for CPTSD and also having a very select few friends to keep in contact with and it has helped me tremendously in my healing. These individuals understand when I am feeling overwhelmed and have to reschedule or don't feel up to chat, getting together or meeting.

In addition to these support areas in my life, I find that present moment mindfulness, which is almost a meditation, keeps me grounded when my anxiety is very high. There is a lot of anxiety for me when I'm either living/thinking about the past or living/thinking about the future. Neither of which I can do anything about. If I can just stay in the moment I'm much less worried, much less anxious, I'm able to enjoy this moment. Maybe it might help you as well. Thee are a lot of resources about present moment mindfulness online if you're interested.
 
I know that solution seems simple but I think that's why it works (for me anyway). Regardless, I hope that little trick helps and wish you the best in your healing journey.

Paperflower