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Hi everyone - does anyone out there pick there skin to the point it's obvious - I'm sure this is related to complex ptsd and it's ruining my life

Hi everyone I'm new to this group - a 34 year old women who endured horrific childhood abuse and seems to attract more of it today.  I am very well read but I can't hold down a job - getting up, staying organized ... It's all so hard for me.  I don't want to go on disability because that's like telling my mother she won - but on the other hand I am loosing motivation to keep trying and I'm traumatized from being fired on 3 or more occasions.  What's your thoughts?