Hi everyone! I hope today is a good day for all of us. :grouphug:
It seems like recently there are more posts that are getting really long. There are some reasons why this is against the Guidelines (http://outofthefog.net/C-PTSD/forum/index.php?topic=1616.0)
QuoteKeep your posts short. Although there are times when a post may need to be longer, members are encouraged to keep posts to 2 - 3 paragraphs as a rule of thumb. If your posts tend to fill more than an entire computer screen, some readers may be tempted to "speed read" or skip to the end. Further, long posts tends to flood the board if made regularly so that the member begins to dominate the board and quieter members may not feel they have a chance to weigh in.
Also, long posts can be very triggering. Long posts force our Moderators to make a choice between reading them and possibly triggering themselves, or skipping these posts in the interest of self-care.
Having said that, please do give yourself the freedom to talk about what you really need to say. We really want this to be a safe place that meets all the needs it can.
Thanks for listening!
:grouphug:
Good reminder Three Roses. Very easy to break this guideline, I know I've done it several times. Something i'm more mindful of in the less stressful times
;)
I agree, I can't read a long post as soon as I see one I think oh no too much my brain can't take it and come out of it! A symptom of cptsd maybe but the shorter the better...ll
A question, is the huge posts with abundance of quotes still okay?
I reply to a lot of people in one big post usually and it looks super big but really there's only a few paragraphs of my writing there. It just looks big cause of the quotes. :S
Speaking for myself, all long posts are difficult to read, no matter if they're quotes or not. I still have to read it all. On a good day, it's ok - on bad days I have to choose between being triggered and overworking myself, or skipping the post.
Thanks for asking!
:heythere:
I wasn't going to say anything, for fear of being misunderstood. But that's the problem--many here are used to never being heard, let alone understood, and can feel stifled trying to fit their pain into sound-bites or twitter-style short bursts which lose their context and meaning.
Agreed, it can be a slog to go through sometimes, definitely triggering on occasion, but this isn't a contest--it's a dialogue between real humans, and some have never been listened to before. There's also an art to editing, but not everyone is used to doing so; they just need and deserve to be heard, understood, and maybe listened to for the first time.
Of course brevity makes for better reads. And I understand it can be tough moderating the output on some days. But many of these posts also act as a form of therapy, or even in lieu of having the luxury of a live therapist to hear them out. It may keep some from finding their heart's voice in fear that they've yet again been told to be silent; all because they didn't say it right.
I can't read a long post, I want to, but I can't get through it without getting lost in my own thoughts. It is the reason, the only reason, why I have never stepped up to moderate. I would like to hear everyone. I would do much better with several smaller post to make one story if necessary. Even part I, part II, part III, would work well.
I don't feel as if anyone is being told to be silent. I feel that the idea is to hear everyone. I feel strongly that this forum never silences someone. Also, moderating is hard. It is done for unselfish reasons with no personal gains. I feel it is important to support our moderates as best we can. They struggle too.
I think it would be a good idea to get into the habit of posting parts, as Dee said. Double posting usually isn't allowed in most forums but I think it would be a good idea to do it more here because it separates long paragraphs of text into kind of bite-sized pieces. So you can read one part/post, then read the other part later when you're feeling up to it. That's just a thought/suggestion though.
Dee: "I feel it is important to support our moderators as best we can. They struggle too."
Precisely! It's exactly what I was afraid might be misunderstood. Perhaps my only point worth considering is that some might fear saying anything at all. I agree unreservedly that brevity is key, just not always possible. What it comes down to is that some things are by nature brief, others take explanation and/or context.
Good points on splitting longer material; which is where the recovery journals can play a role, too. They're kind of a free range platform, whereas the discussion posts can go long, short, or in between.
Hopefully, people will only hear me saying to be brief when it's possible, and that this is for them as much as it is for the readers. Long posts, you will notice, have fewer responses and fewer views.
Also, the same rules on brevity don't always apply to our online journals; if you're writing and you're into a train of thought you don't want to have to stop and see how long your post is getting. ;)
Quote from: woodsgnome on October 10, 2017, 01:25:50 AM
But many of these posts also act as a form of therapy, or even in lieu of having the luxury of a live therapist to hear them out.
I hear you Three Roses, I hear Dee as well.
What woodsgnome writes here applies to me. I'm beginning to be able to write in my paper diary again without SI but over the past months since I joined here I've been posting a lot here and making progress because of these long posts. I get to the middle or end of the post and suddenly I understand!! Or suddenly the knowledge drops into my emotions, becomes visceral etc. Here is a place I can write without SI and I get responses. Both very meaningful to me.
I even have a T, though not for much longer. But even with T, far more comes up than I ever have time to say in T.
QuoteHaving said that, please do give yourself the freedom to talk about what you really need to say. We really want this to be a safe place that meets all the needs it can.
Please please please don't hear me say it's forbidden to write long posts. Sometimes it's very necessary and cathartic, and if you're on the trail of an idea or revelation it needs to be pursued.
I was afraid of this being misunderstood which is why I've waited to say something. But I'm also learning to speak up for my own needs. I've recently experienced some burn out here and had an episode because of it.
Our Guidelines are in place for a reason. At the risk of over-repeating myself, I'll say it again: long posts don't get the views or the responses that more succinct posts do. If you're in need of a response, or just want your post to be read, it's in your own best interest to make it as condensed as possible.
The length of posts in your journals don't have the same request. They can be as long as you want.
QuoteI'm beginning to be able to write in my paper diary again without SI but over the past months since I joined here I've been posting a lot here and making progress because of these long posts. I get to the middle or end of the post and suddenly I understand!! Or suddenly the knowledge drops into my emotions, becomes visceral etc. Here is a place I can write without SI and I get responses. Both very meaningful to me.
This is why it's important to be able to write a long post. Sometimes it is necessary!
Thanks, everyone, for reading this and weighing in. All your responses are thought provoking and will be listened to!! I love you guys.
:heythere:
Quote from: Dee on October 10, 2017, 02:17:53 AM
moderating is hard. It is done for unselfish reasons with no personal gains. I feel it is important to support our moderates as best we can. They struggle too.
Thank you Dee, for understanding. I think it’s important that we all, as a community, show mutual respect to each other. For me, that’s the most important part.
Lingurine
Thank you Three Roses for bringing this up! :)
I know I have been prone to writing slightly long posts :whistling:, I will do my best to try and shorten them! Sometimes it's just difficult topic wise, emotion wise and language wise. But it'll be good practice trying to find the core of the problem rather than all the details (though sometimes they are just as important too). :)
A very gentle reminder indeed three Roses - :thumbup:
Hello eveyone! I havent been here long but I just had to say how nice it is to see the way you interact and care for one another's feelings. Thank you so much for what you are doing. I am one who can not see a therapist at this time and spend so much time alone, this has already helped me to feel connected and not so alone. For that I am greatful! :cheer:
I had no idea. The title of the thread didn't catch my eye. So I just didn't know. I struggle with memory, so I didn't remember the guidelines. Reading the reminder did jog my memory. I will try to keep my posts a little less long winded.
OOps thank you for that reminder - I did not know there was actually a guideline... and a very sensible one it is! My first post was long ( not a good starting example) and I apologize and will make any subsequent post shorter.
I will also read the guidelines :-P
Thank you moderators! :applause: