I've always, as long as I can remember, used small repetitive motions to self-sooth. I noticed recently that I still do this. I was a little surprised at how often and the variety of small movements I use.
Today, I was triggered and ended up getting emotional while at work. Since then, after I calmed back down, I've been stroking my chin, fiddling with my ears, kicking my feet against my chair wheels, or tapping my shoe-covered toes on the floor mat. When I am almost calm, the chin rub is enough. When I feel myself getting more excited or emotional, the wheel or floor taps start, or I feel compelled to rub one forearm with the other hand. When I was full EF and near loosing it again, my feet were all over the place under my desk. If anyone could have seen it, it would have looked like a child's tantrum up under there.
Sometimes, I can use the repetitive motion - especially tapping - to bring myself back to now and get my job done. Today was not one of those days.
Does anyone else do these types of things to self-sooth when you are getting, or have become, agitated?
yes, and when it's really bad i can find myself even pacing from room to room!
when i am like that, i feel jumpy, nervous.
I rock with my leg. Repetitive motion is recommended for self soothing. I didn't realize I did this until both my psychiatrist and psychologist independently mentioned it.
I have repetetive motion habits as well. Rubbing my feet together, rubbing my arms or shoulders, stuff like that. I used to fidgit with my jewelery but I rarely wear any these days.
Quote from: Dee on January 07, 2017, 05:01:15 AM
I rock with my leg. Repetitive motion is recommended for self soothing. I didn't realize I did this until both my psychiatrist and psychologist independently mentioned it.
How cool of us to come up with this on our own, then!
Quote from: movementforthebetter on January 07, 2017, 05:36:14 AM
I used to fidgit with my jewelery but I rarely wear any these days.
Same here! I had this one ring that I could poke my thumb fingernail into the design. It gave a nice tug as I pulled the nail back out. That ring got me through my parent's separation and divorce - well, it helped a lot anyway.
Quote from: Three Roses on January 06, 2017, 10:25:17 PM
yes, and when it's really bad i can find myself even pacing from room to room!
The pacing at home is what gave my agitation away to my husband. I don't normally pace. He got me to talk about it and spent the rest of the weekend helping me to calm down or keep calm.
Yes I relate - I've done this thing since a child where I run my nails into material and move them up and down, jeans being the best and my pillow - it is so soothing
Also I do a similar thing with my scalp feeling about for bumps and bits
When I'm really agitated the leg goes up and down also when socially anxious I blink a lot
Yes. I'm very much into physical comfort. I do these type of things a lot, lol.
I chew the inside of my cheek. Or I pet one of my eyebrows. Or sort of examine my eyebrow with my fingers for lack of a better term. I also pet my lips, lol.
It helps me focus ;D
Spirals, that reminds me that my husband 'pets' his eyebrows and palm rubs his face. When he does either of these, I know to try to help alleviate his nerves. He (also ucPTSD) was having a tough night last night, so when we were relaxing for the evening, I rubbed his eyebrows and temples for him ~ he says that really helps a lot to calm him. The first time he asked me to do that, it was strange to me. I was cautious about being so close to his eyes. But, when I saw how much it relieved and relaxed him, I got over my worries. It's now a tradition between us when I see him very stressed.
I've experienced these before--I rub my palm with my opposing thumb, and rub my earlobes.
I don't think the repetitive movement is all that unusual. In my experience it helps calm you down because it's a constant when your brain is making everything swirl around you. I rock back and forth with my arms across my chest. Even when it's a slight trigger I find myself with my hands in my lap and rocking gently. It's helpful.
:yeahthat:
Yeah, I think I read in a book somewhere that it helps your nervous system re-regulate itself.
I'm just a little surprised that folks like me - who didn't get the nurturing we deserved as babies and toddlers, have figured out things that work for us. I think it's pretty cool that we're wired to find these things even in the absence of anyone to teach us.
I've noticed the same things in myself, but they seem almost destructive... I have Trichotillomania; it's a compulsion to pull your hair. It's not pretty. I've gotten better as an adult but I still find myself doing it when I'm having a particularly bad day. Or I'll pick at my cuticles. I'm looking into finding a hobby where I use my hands a lot, to distract from picking at myself. Like, knitting, or something.
Lindsay,
I've taken to the hot trend of grown-up coloring books. I will say that the cheaper books are just repetitive patters and they get boring after a while. But, even those are fun to go back to when I need to 'not think' for a while. The more expensive books (I only have 1 so far) are a LOT of fun and I feel very creative while coloring in them. I have no drawing or even coloring talent, but I still get to feel creative and to make something pretty.
My son will join me sometimes. He feels more grown-up coloring with me like that.
A messy, feel good hobby is ceramics. I am not talking about using molds, free clay. It feels good in my hands and I can make things. I started a class on the community college.
TW SH
Lindsey,
I used to be a cutter. I don't self harm very often anymore, but I still scratch parts of my body way too intensely sometimes. I personally still think self harm is a very effective way to relieve emotions, but I agree the aftereffects are not pretty. :Idunno:
I like how everyone is throwing out their self-soothing hobbies, lol. Now I want to try ceramics and coloring books (I secretly was very interested in them, lol). I have a barbie I dress and pose sometimes. I used to play a lot of RPGs, but I need to find a new game to beat... I can tell myself it's stress management :sunny:
Spirals, thanks for your post but I have to strongly disagree with you about SH being a way to "relieve emotions".
If you're injuring yourself, even in a minor way, or if you have thoughts of harming yourself, reach out for help. Any form of self-injury is a sign that you're in pain, and that you may need help to escape that pain in a healthy way.
If you're in therapy, your T can help you find alternate ways to express your emotions. If you don't have a therapist, reach out to someone you trust who can help you take the first steps to successful treatment. There is supportive, caring and nonjudgmental help out there! :) :hug:
TW SH
Hi, Three Roses
Sorry about the trigger warning. I should have realized the post needed one :doh: I didn't mean to encourage self-harm, but I could see how my post could be interpreted that way. I feel that shame can sometimes fuel the cycle of self-harm, so I didn't want LL to feel ashamed that her coping mechanism wasn't as "appropriate" as some of the others.
I am looking for a therapist but it's been hard to find one that accepts my insurance. I am actually very articulate with people about my pain, and talking it out helps but I feel that it's more of an investment in decreasing it over the long-term and raising my stress threshold. I do know how to express my emotions in a healthy way. I'm not suicidal.
But talking doesn't seem to work on an emotion that has suddenly "spiked." Self-harm is more something I do if my frustration spikes into a particular nail-on-chalkboard level. Like from over-stimulation. I know some people rely on it for day to day emotions (which I believe is problematic from personal experience trying this route) so I should have thought of that implication before I posted what I did.
I do agree that self-harm is often counterproductive and is a warning sign that pain/stress is reaching unsustainable levels. I don't think someone should rely on it instead of building more appropriate coping mechanisms and reaching out for support :hug:
:hug: ;D