Growing up, the best I could hope for was to be left alone. I often think of my M as the eye of Sauron. If she were looking at you, you were under a magnifying glass. Everything you did or said was wrong. My siblings and I basically tried to throw each other in her path in order to get away. Anyhow, I view anyone giving me any attention as threatening. If someone asks me if I am ok, I immediately freeze and remind myself not to show weakness in case there is a predator. I so desperately want others to care about me, but I don't trust anyone enough to really let them care for me. Any sign of concern for me is suspicious in itself. My SOT says "why are they thinking about me at all?" Sigh.