So I just fired the support agency who I had support workers through. I am pretty confident that it was the right decision. Its been a string of crappy even harmful service. To continue with them feels like not protecting myself against more harm. The problem is now I have no support worker and I feel afraid.
Making the right decisions for myself don't always feel good......is that ok? Is it normal? or does it mean it was the wrong decision?
It sounds as if you made a good decision in protecting yourself. It's brave too because as you say you are now without support workers. The forum is here for you. There are other members on here getting by without therapists, counsellors etc. Have you read Pete Walker's book e.g.? You can access large parts of it online.
I think it's pretty normal with cptsd to question our own decisions. If you're like me and your FOO lambasted your decisions all the while growing up, then you won't have much confidence in your decisions now. With time, you will come to trust your own decisions. It does get better. :)
Hi, you say you had an agency, are there other agencies that could be of service to you that wont be harmful perhaps?
I also agree with Blueberry, it's corageous to stand up for yourself and making desicions about your life the way you want it. Even if it doesn't always feel so good right away.
We have some info/suggestions [http://cptsd.org/forum/index.php?topic=2518.0]here[/url] for when members experience problems with therapy and support.
One of the resources is TELL (http://www.therapyabuse.org/contact_us.htm) in which "volunteers are available to serve as sounding boards for victims/survivors who have concerns about the support they are receiving." Even though you were exploited, it might help to tell them about the agency's lack of help (which is surprising and quite unprofessional to say the least). They may be able to recommend other agencies as per Sceal's suggestion.