Hi everyone :-)
I have struggled with severe depression for most of my life, and have recently come to a place where I am managing it quite well.
It was around this time, where I was feeling better than ever, that I soon began feeling a sense of dread start to build up within me.
I has this constant feeling of dread, anxiety and borderline panic.
I realised that there were things from my childhood and early adult life I had not properly dealt with, and the trauma of it was still present in my body, and had permanently impacted me in a negative way.
A therapist friend of mine spoke to me about Complex PTSD, and recommended a book for me to read about it.
I saw myself in the book so clearly, but found it triggered a panic attack every time I read it. Even just thinking about Complex PTSD, and I begin to feel my throat tighten.
So I've realised this whole time, I've probably gone untreated for Complex PTSD and I am feeling like a complete mess. Now I get such terrible anxiety and regularly get panic attacks, which was never really a thing I overly struggled with even during when I had severe depression.
It's almost as if the depression was masking CPTSD, and now that that is being managed, this other stuff is coming through.
I am at a place where I know I need professional help, but am not sure where to even start. I've done a lot talking therapy from when I had depression and found it borderline useless. I last thing I did was PSH Hypnotherapy which did wonders for me, but at this stage, I am not sure that I could physically stand sitting quietly with my eyes closed without going into a panic attack.
Does anyone have any therapy style suggestions? I am considering Somatic Therapy or EDMR, but I am scared because I know I need to deal with it, but every damn thing is almost a trigger for me.
I go from laughing, to crying, to anxiety, to panic like some sort of weird cycle.
I have struggled with severe depression for most of my life, and have recently come to a place where I am managing it quite well.
It was around this time, where I was feeling better than ever, that I soon began feeling a sense of dread start to build up within me.
I has this constant feeling of dread, anxiety and borderline panic.
I realised that there were things from my childhood and early adult life I had not properly dealt with, and the trauma of it was still present in my body, and had permanently impacted me in a negative way.
A therapist friend of mine spoke to me about Complex PTSD, and recommended a book for me to read about it.
I saw myself in the book so clearly, but found it triggered a panic attack every time I read it. Even just thinking about Complex PTSD, and I begin to feel my throat tighten.
So I've realised this whole time, I've probably gone untreated for Complex PTSD and I am feeling like a complete mess. Now I get such terrible anxiety and regularly get panic attacks, which was never really a thing I overly struggled with even during when I had severe depression.
It's almost as if the depression was masking CPTSD, and now that that is being managed, this other stuff is coming through.
I am at a place where I know I need professional help, but am not sure where to even start. I've done a lot talking therapy from when I had depression and found it borderline useless. I last thing I did was PSH Hypnotherapy which did wonders for me, but at this stage, I am not sure that I could physically stand sitting quietly with my eyes closed without going into a panic attack.
Does anyone have any therapy style suggestions? I am considering Somatic Therapy or EDMR, but I am scared because I know I need to deal with it, but every damn thing is almost a trigger for me.
I go from laughing, to crying, to anxiety, to panic like some sort of weird cycle.