Don't want to help myself in flashback

[owl25]

When I am in a flashback, I really struggle to help myself come out of it. Eg the steps of flashback management, I don't want to do them. I just find myself in desperate need for someone else to come help me and the fact that there's no one there keeps me in unbearable pain. Has anyone else dealt with this?

[marta1234]

I hear you, owl. When I have flashbacks, I personally cannot complete the flashback management steps, more because of a specific step that I don't agree with. Maybe the steps are too much for you, now? As a lot of it is reassurance of safety, compassion to yourself. And to actually do that it takes a lot of energy and might not work at first try.

Hope you find something that helps, sending a hug .

[Not Alone]

I have a few thoughts. Could we be the "someone" to help you during a flashback? Are there one or two of the steps that resonate or are more helpful than others? I never use all the steps. Personally, I have a hard time with "emotional flashback," so I have crossed it out and wrote "amygdala hijacking/triggered state." The steps are a tool. Do what works for you.

Sometimes I feel like, "Don't tell me I'm in an EF. I am in real danger or __________ is really happening." Also sometimes I feel like I don't deserve the kindness of receiving help.

[owl25]

It is such a relief to read these responses, that people understand. I think a big part of it for me is that following those steps feels invalidating. The core of the flashback is that I am completely and utterly alone in this world and there is no safe adult to help me feel safe. To have to help myself not feel that way.. it reinforces that I am on my own, which is the core of my trauma.

marta1234 how do you deal with it instead? Thanks for the hug. 

notalone I need for someone to understand, I think maybe you (OOTS) can be the someone?

Sometimes I feel like, "Don't tell me I'm in an EF. I am in real danger or __________ is really happening." Also sometimes I feel like I don't deserve the kindness of receiving help.

This happens to me too. I feel less alone now.. thank you.