There are lots of things that are just in our own heads, that would never leave this area unless someone ask directly.......
So, what's the big questions that you might answer if your therapist asked directly?
That's a big question, Salto :)
I think for me it changes, depending on the situation and topic we're talking about. Sometimes I wish she would stop up and ask "How are you right now?", she does that sometimes but in other words. She asks me what I'm feeling physically. And sometimes I think she knows, but I still need her to ask so I can actually voice it out loud.
But these days I mostly want her to tell me her assessment of me, or her thoughts on what I'm saying. Of where she thinks I am right now, how big of a progression chance I have.
I would like her to talk to me about dissociation. The full spectrum of it. Because I'm fading more and more often - and it's getting difficult to deal with. Difficult to hide.
What does this mean to you?
I get triggered a lot by questions so I'm happy my T doesn't ask any additional ones!
where do you want to start?
what do you need from me?
how are you feeling?
what do you want to explore next?
and repeat.
pretty generic, but i've never really had a t ask me those things in over 30 yrs. of looking for therapeutic help. i think it would've been very nice, reassuring, showed interest in me, and felt respected and respectful. these questions would've also opened up hidden avenues that i wasn't aware of.
Quotewhat's the big questions that you might answer if your therapist asked directly?
I'd be interested in hearing what question(s) you might answer Salto.
Wow! lot of great questions!
I've just started out with a new therapist and she ask: What do you wanna work with today? How do you wanna use this session? These are some of the questions I've missed in former therapies.
But many times I wish the t ask direct questions instead of suggestions like "I don't know what's going on in your head, if it's in the past or if it's just empty". Would be much easier with a direct question: "Are you in the past or are your head just empty? :)
Any more questions?
Mine is pretty good at turning a question around, so to speak. So if I ask what she thinks, she likes to reverse by asking what I think, perhaps even why I'm asking it. Then she may indeed have an answer or reaction, but as it's my therapy she wants my perspective first.
I've come to appreciate that, as I realize too often I'm just fishing for a quick fix answer, and she's coy enough to know that isn't always in my best interests. This characterizes her approach of being with and for the client's best interests, and not just providing what she thinks is the best way to do some magic called therapy.
Once we uncover where I'm actually coming from (fear, grief, anger, etc), we can investigate further and answer the question(s) together. Or not; maybe it'll just jolt some further explorations, but perhaps I'll discover something I'd have never considered before.
Are you ok? How are you feeling right now?
Just the simple questions I feel if she actually asked me I'd be able to open up more then trying to battle on with the attitude that I'm ok when I'm really not feeling it and sometimes feel too scared to say that I'm actually feeling crap and no I'm not ok right now!
Quote from: Eyessoblue on March 24, 2018, 08:47:36 PM
Are you ok? How are you feeling right now?
Just the simple questions I feel if she actually asked me I'd be able to open up more then trying to battle on with the attitude that I'm ok when I'm really not feeling it and sometimes feel too scared to say that I'm actually feeling crap and no I'm not ok right now!
Oh yeah! been there many times! Would you be able to answer that you're not okay?
Salto; I would eventually after I fluffed around and told her I'm ok trying to convince her but she's not stupid and can normally tell just by looking at me how I am, I always am aware of her doing this 'body scan' on me as I walk in, she's often noticed my hands shaking and asks why I'm so anxious, going to therapy makes me so anxious!!