New member presentation

[LizaCoolvibe]

Hi everyone,

First, please excuse my English, as it's not my native language and I am prone to grammar errors.

I reached outofthestorm website while searching information about family roles (hero, scapegoat...).

Browsing outofthestorm revealed a very comprehensive list of resources concerning heavy problem I do suffer from. This made me wanted to try to interact in the forum.

I was sexually abused by my father during quite some time. It's been 10 month that I'm in therapy (cognitive oriented), and 2 months maybe that I started to acknowledge the emotional pain.
I guess the daily problems I face are similar to some members : extreme panic attack (when you cannot do anything but lie in pain), being anxious most of the time, sense of imminent doom, substance abuse, feeling over guilty, depression, intense shame...

These problems are, in my experience, very hard to express verbally to a medical doctor.  Even writing about them was nearly impossible for me some time ago, so I think therapy is helping.

I have been exchanging by mail with a woman survivor for some weeks now. Although it rise intense emotions, I founded these exchanges to be very meaningful and helpful. They somewhat validate my own experiences and feelings through her own experiences and feelings.
I mean, numerous problems are very similar for her and I, although we aren't the same gender and not the same country. It helps me not to see me crazy if someone else is going through the same kind of heavy problem. Of course, there is also an emotional dimension, I have genuine affection and empathy for her and care about her.

I think I might now benefit and be helpful in a more open area. I am keeping the exchanges with my friend, but I want to have the opportunity to talk "in public" (in a forum). I am not sure if I am being clear.

Cheers

[Kizzie]

Hi Liza and a warm welcome to OOTS    I think your post was quite clear so please keep posting. 

I am so sorry to hear you suffered sexual abuse at the hands of your father (F).  There are many here who endured childhood sexual abuse (CSA) so hopefully you will feel a degree of comfort being more open 

Members often use short forms like F and CSA so if you come across one and don't know what it means just check out the list of "Acronyms" which is under "Resources" at the top of the page.  There's also a "Glossary" there for any terms you might not understand.

Kizzie

[LizaCoolvibe]

Thank you Kizzie

I'm aware of some acronym such as CSA from reading English books on the topic, although I wasn't for F (father). Is it a commonly used acronym in English (just me being curious)?

Being new, I am not sure concerning the various boards organization. Hum, actually I just get that "child board" doesn't mean "board specifically for children to post" 
Concerning the boards under "Development of CPTSD in Childhood", are each sub-board ("Dissociation", "Flashback", "Self Harm"...) stricly limited to discussions about their title?
For instance, I used to have flashback during which I dissociate. Would posting about these be considered inappropriate in Flashback or Dissociation, then it would fit in General Discussion?

Sorry to ask, I just want to avoid breaking tacit community rules.   

[Kizzie]

F for father is used here because the word comes up so much, same for M or B or S and many of the other shortened versions of words. 

The sub-forums (or "child boards" which is what this particular platform SMF calls sub-forums), are arranged by specific topic, but they do overlap so not to worry too much where you post.  Sometimes we (Moderators) will move a post but more often than not it's fine and we leave it where it is.

There are Guidelines for Members here you can read through. 

[JT0519]

Welcome! I am new here as well. I hope you find this resource useful.
It's good to hear your therapy is helping you as well.
Hope you have a good day,
See you around!