Since my parents as a kid they taught me rejection,fear and shame of not being worthy. It's followed me like a cloud. I've been sober a year but I sometimes still feel worthless. It is just a false reality though. It starts when I believe the lies. That I am not loved and I am a lost cause.
Then I remember verses in the Bible which point me to the truth that I am loved. That the old things like being abused by my mom before church for example have past away and have nothing to do with my relationship with God. I believe that faith in Jesus cleanses me of all anger, bitterness, and gives me hope that I am being healed. Even though the flashbacks come and go. I have strength.
Welcome to the forum Notforsaken! :heythere: It's good you reached out. I'm sorry you're having such a rough day.
Feeling not worthy is pretty common with cptsd. You write that your parents taught you rejection, fear and shame. That leads to us not feeling worthy. But we are worthy! I agree, it's hard to unlearn but step-by-step we do on here.